Wednesday, June 29, 2011

WTF, the headline is LITERAL!? O_O;;

Woman accused of using child as a weapon on TTC streetcar

My first reaction upon reading the headline was to think "I just had a v strange mental image", and then I read the article and O_O;;

It's TRUE :O

Police are looking for a woman accused of beating a fellow TTC passenger, using a child as a weapon.

Police said the woman boarded the streetcar last Friday around 5 p.m. with the child in a stroller and got into an altercation with another passenger. The woman picked up the child and started hitting the other passenger with the child, police said.

When other passengers intervened, the woman pulled one of them by the hair, police said.

The incident occurred after the woman boarded the streetcar at Dundas St. E. and Parliament St. Police received the call when the streetcar was near Broadview.

The woman got off the streetcar with the child before police arrived.

She is described as being around 30 years old with olive skin, between 5-foot-3 and 5-foot-6, and between 130 and 155 pounds. She has long, straight dark hair past her shoulders, and was wearing a peach button-down shirt with long sleeves, khaki skirt and black shoes.

Holy WTF o_o;; She used the kid as a bat!? >:O That's TERRIBLE! >_<;;

I hope they catch her, both for the assault and for abusing her child >:\ I mean it's bad enuf to attack other passengers, but to use your own child as a weapon? -_-;;

Rawr >:|

Ami amongst the blogoverse! :D

My Magyc: The Gendering cards appear to be spreading like.. well.. not wildfire... a little dry leaf fire? o_O Something like that xD But it's still pretty cool! :D I started them on Man Boobz just cuz I like making cards and I like telling stories THRU cards and letting ppl construct the world in their heads via the flavour text (kinda like never showing the whole monster in a horror movie :3 ) and apparently ppl rly like them! :D It's always the things you dun expect >_>;;

The art isn't mine, I just find it off Google image search. I try to credit when I can find credit (sometimes they've alrdy been posted somewhere w/o credit :\ ) and if nebody wants me to remove their art, or credit them, I'm ttlly ok w/ that :] If I could draw I ttlly would be drawing it xD Also, they're obv just for fun, I'm not making any money off of this. :]

Johnny Pez has written a little fanfic (that still has more to come) based on my cards (and the backstory that I'll put up here at some point xD ) and I think it's AWESOME xD And I'm so flattered he did it and incorporated my other cards into it :3 It's very squeeful :3

Also, The Zeta Male, who is a moderate MRA also likes my cards :3 And Ithiliana, a feminist English professor, Holly, of the blog Pervocracy and Ozymandias like the cards too! :D

Ami Angelwings: uniting MRAs and Feminists in geeky fun since 2011. xD

So I'm quite happy by this, cuz I like making ppl happy and so... okay, I'm getting repetitive xD Neways! YAY! :D

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

On the "controversial" Kia ads :o

Are these Kia ads too hot for comfort?


I actually think the IDEA behind these ads are kinda clever.. the idea of the "cold" (childish) vs the "hot" (adult) thing.. tho I would have done it w/ less focus on the sex thing b/c it's pretty obvious they're targeting a very specific audience (straight white men) and you could have done something more like having it involve violence or other "mature themes" on one side and the more toned down childish thing on the other... the focus on "cute" vs "porny" feels a lot like they're saying "this is how girls see things" vs "this is how boys see things' or something just cuz it's so clearly the straight male gaze :\

BUT I think the real issue that ppl are having is the teacher one (above) which is... holy WTF o_o

I think the problem is that you can see it either as "these are two ways to draw a scene involving a descrip of "male teacher w/ female student" OR "this is the same scene, interpreted differently from a different perspective" which is where it gets creepy and I think it's where ppl are getting creeped out... b/c I think it comes off a lot as "this is what's happening" (on one side) and "this is what the teacher sees" on the other :\ and if ppl are reading it that way I can see why they'd be upset or at least disturbed... like is she supposed to be a grade schooler? The OTHER one was ok, b/c it's obv the chars were both adults and they had been SDed... this one clearly one is adult and one is a child :\

And before we get into "that's not the intent".. yeah but if you use ads to try to sell things obv you want them to send a msg, and if b/c you were vague or it had unintended readings that weren't obvious, it's still what ppl are seeing :\ And so maybe it's a better idea (for your reputation and your company) to apologize for unintentionally sending the wrong msg and pulling the ads, and putting out new ones (or clearer ones, or ones that have a different theme, like I suggested) which appears to be what they're doing :3

I think ALSO what makes ppl uncomfortable (or turned on!) is the juxtaposition of childish imagery next to racy adult imagery, and it's a real sudden shift for a lot of ppl to go from childish thoughts and memory to suddenly adult porny stuff... OR it's a turn on as I said (there's a lot of fetishes that involve adult bodies in childish outfits... or hentai involving childish cartoon chars drawn w/ adult anatomy, I think the clash is part of the attraction) and that could be part of the effectiveness to some, and to others either disgust or shame. :\

I personally find this stuff rly rly neat... and I've thought of the attraction of wanting to "grow up" your childhood for a lot of ppl (whether it's making childish cartoons w/ adult writing which is v popular these days, or in terms of a sexual fetish thing) but I also get how for the teacher one, ppl would find it rly creepy, b/c it's not exactly clear if that's STILL an underage young girl in the other panel or if it's supposed to be a different situation all together that just APPEARS similar superficially :|

The problem, I think is that for a lot of ppl (incl myself) the first reading was that this is the same situation, from a different PoV, and that makes it seem A LOT like "this is what's happening" vs "this is what a pedophile sees" and I think it's prolly not good for car sales if a lot of ppl are reading it like that >_<;; (regardless of "intent") The other way also that some might be looking at it, is the opposite, that the girl is imagining seducing her teacher -_-;; (I'm suspecting the anti-feminist knee-jerkers will claim this reading xD) Both ways I can see ppl going "creepy" or at least being turned off and not wanting to buy the car >_>;; (and as I said, I think the same child/adult clash effect can be done W/O having sex and therefore none of this would be a problem at all :3 ) (OR as I said, that taken TOGETHER, I think a lot of ppl are getting the idea that this is a female/male perspective thing :\)

Now that I think about it, Kia should hire ME xD I'm basically these ads xD Ppl think I write like a child, and a lot of ppl think I AM a child, but then there is the grown up (or super smexy) stuff too xD

Edit: My friend Kirbywarp gave a good example (on IM) of a way this confusion could have been avoided. :] If they did the "hot" side of the teacher scenario with chars who looked different, or were in different clothing, or made it more clear (I realize on 5th reading that maybe it was meant to be) it was in a university or something, that would have been clear that "this is the sexy version of this scenario" rather than have ppl wonder if that's supposed to be the same girl, or if she's still supposed to be in grade school. xD

Monday, June 27, 2011

Wow! Go Brian Burke again! :D

OMFG this made me smile so much :D



I was alrdy so proud of him when he came out in public support of his late-son being gay (as GM of the Toronto Maple Leafs, and being so involved in macho hockey and sports culture, it's still so amazing and heart warming :3 ) and then his son died :( and it was so awful :\ and he marched in his son's memory in Pride which was so moving and bittersweet :( (and later that year, the Stanley Cup was in the Chicago Pride Parade thx to a Chicago Blackhawks player! :3)

and now he's convinced our conservative (and incredibly close minded, possibly homophobic, def racist) mayor to change his mind in participating in Pride! :D

I may not agree w/ all his hockey decisions (or his stance on hockey violence), but when it comes to being a person, Brian Burke is an amazing awesome person and a wonderful and loving father. :]

It's amazing to me that as backwards as hockey can be about head injuries, and European players, of all the major pro team sports in North America, it's had the most ppl stepping up for the queer community :o They had the Cup in Pride, they have Brian Burke and they have Sean Avery who came out publicly in support for equal marriage in New York, and that's more active players who have come out to support queer ppl (rather than merely say "I would be ok w/ it I guess") than other sports :] I wonder if it has something to do w/ the "tough guy" nature of hockey, that ppl know they aren't gonna be called names or made fun of, and they're taken more srsly also? :o If so, then it's great hockey players and executives are using that reputation to stand up for marginalized ppl (who are esp marginalized in the realm of team sports)! :D

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Trollbert amuses and inspires Ami, but not in the way he prolly wants XD

So Trollbert is at it again xD And of course, as usual, he can dish it out but he can't take it and he's exploding all over the place and claiming it was all an experiment, or ppl aren't smart enuf to understand him or etc etc xD

My only response is this

xDDDD (that's from my greater Magyc: The Gendering set that I'm doing on Manboobz xD)

Sunday, June 19, 2011

UGH >:O A rape joke is a rape joke >:| It isn't funny or better cuz it's about men >:O

I just saw a TV trailer for the movie "Horrible Bosses"

The 2nd final scene of the trailer had 2 chars walking together and one char says "I can't go to jail, look at me, I'd get raped like crazy." and the char next to him looks insulted and jealous and says "I'd get raped just as much", the other guy then reassures his friend's self-esteem "oh no, yeah, yeah, you'd definitely get raped as much"


Not rape culture at all! Or being dismissive of prison rape and also using the "rape is about physical attraction" (which also implies that all male rapists of men are gay or bi) >:O

Gross gross gross >:O

Saturday, June 18, 2011

Ami and friends discuss the Vancouver Hockey Riots xD

[01:59] Pazi: Vancouver!
[01:59] Pazi: You're supposed to riot when you WIN.
[01:59] Ami Angelwings: yeah
[01:59] Pazi: Get it right!
[01:59] Ami Angelwings: like LA and boston
[01:59] Ami Angelwings: it was scary... like i heard the sports reporters on the radio and on TV
[01:59] Ami Angelwings: and it sounded like they were reporting from a war zone
[01:59] Ami Angelwings: oh my god, people are rushing towrads us, they're tring to get out of the area
[02:00] Ami Angelwings: another car just exploded
[02:00] Ami Angelwings: there's smoke bellowing into the iar
[02:00] Ami Angelwings: we have to get out of here
[02:00] Pazi: Shit! Someone spawned broodlings!
[02:00] Pazi: Get the siege tank!
[02:00] Ami Angelwings: xD
[02:00] Pazi: Siege mode!
[02:00] Ami Angelwings: INFESTED TERRANS
[02:00] Pazi: Nooo0! Infesteds!
[02:00] Ami Angelwings: GO GO GO!!!
[02:00] Pazi: Sunken colonies!
[02:00] Ami Angelwings: FOR AIUR!
[02:00] Pazi: This is CBC News saying goodby---hurrghhhghgh
[02:00] Ami Angelwings: ENTARO ADUN!
[02:00] Pazi: XD
[02:01] Ami Angelwings: now that's a sports riot!
[02:01] Ami Angelwings: that'd be korean riots
[02:01] Ami Angelwings: i wonder if they riot in korea
[02:01] Ami Angelwings: when like savi0r loses
[02:01] Ami Angelwings: or tossgirl
[02:01] Pazi: XD
[02:01] Pazi: Starcraft Riots. o.o

Friday, June 17, 2011

Why the authenticity of lived experiences matter (and how those experiences have always mattered in our society)

I've had some thoughts about the general outcry of the reveal of the Gay Girl In Damascus as being a white guy who just wanted ppl to listen to what he knows is the truth and why won't ppl listen to him just b/c he's a white Western guy. -_-;; It seems a lot of ppl RLY want to try to spin this into why anti-oppression ppl are stupid and how it proves that they'll listen to a white straight cis abled guy as long as he wore a superficial mask of another group. -_-;; Except y'know, that's not what happened. xD

Case in point (yus they are MRAs, but this is a good example xD )

As many of you may know, modern leftism is concerned with something they call social justice. Whatever they name it, it’s basically a system where people are assigned to castes based on their race, gender, sexual orientation, religion and level of disability. The less white, male, straight, Christian and able-bodied you are, the less “privilege” you have, and perversely, the more your opinions matter. In the world of academia, and its close cousin, the leftist blogosphere, identity politics are the most important factor in whether or not your arguments are accepted. Thus, if you’re a straight able bodied white male, you are barred from commenting on issues related to gays, disabled people, and women, since you have straight privilege, ableist privilege and male privilege. Moreover, you’re not allowed to criticize any opinions by any gays, disabled people, and women on the left, no matter what the subject. Because you have so much privilege, you see.

Which is of course a gigantic strawperson b/c it's easier to knock down "they believe that the more oppressions you have the more right you are on ANY SUBJECT" vs "they believe those with lived experiences are valuable and important voices when talking about the specific oppression that they have lived". >_>;; Nuance. By Calvin Klein.

But then something strange happened. Even though Futrelle had most definitely paid his feminist dues, even though he’d set up and run his own site and criticized only other straight males, thus making sure he wasn’t abusing his privilege, he was still run out of town by the Feministe crowd. Why? Because he used the word “crazy” when describing some opinion Adams had. Obviously this showed what a cruel ableist he was, because “crazy” refers to people with mental disabilities. Check it out, the frenzy the feminists work themselves into in the comment section is worth a read. For the lulz.

Here’s my take on what happened. The crowd at Feministe doesn’t just hate male privilege. It simply hates men, period. This explains why they disqualified a guy who played by all their rules on a technicality. And that goes for the rest of the leftist blogosphere too. Within this world, and academia, straight white males, because of their imagined privileges, are the lowest of the low. They’re the unclean class.

Um. Sure. >_>;; I'll explain later on this post why him being a woman, or even a black woman, wouldn't have mattered. Also apparently I am now obligated (must've missed that memo xD), as an anti-oppression person to think white men are the unclean class. xD Remember all you white guys who read my blog... You must shower at least twice a day, once before you read my blog, and once while you're reading my blog.

This brings me back to these straight men pretending to be gay women. Why did they do it? Because, in the leftist world, it was the only way for their voices to be heard. Even if they’d been complete flagellants, constantly ritually purifying themselves by “examining their own privilege”, they’d still be unclean. And the messed up thing is, as gay bloggers they were effective! “ Paula Brooks” and “her” site was among the most popular, which just goes to show you that when men are allowed to compete on even terms, they win. That’s why Futrelle wasn’t allowed to contribute to Feministe anymore. Because within a week of posting, it was clear that this man, misguided douchebag that he is, was the best writer on the damn site, period.

I love how that they just decided that David was the best writer by far on Feministe b/c well he's a white man. xD It's like pick your poison I guess... the feminist white guy tastes better than any of the other options. xD

But okay, let's start. The issue about ppl pretending to be other ppl and being taken differently, is not that men are hated, or cis ppl can’t talk about video games when trans ppl are around, or w/e… it’s when talking about oppressions that real ppl face, ppl who face those oppressions and are of that group have actual lived exps, and thoughts and opinions formed by those and it isn’t just hypothetical theory :\

And when ppl make up caricatures, they are implying that they’ve had lived experiences as that group and their opinions were formed by those, and more than that they make up experiences they claim that they have personally experienced in order to throw more weight behind their opinion. It’s extremely dishonest. It’s no different than ppl making up military service and situations on the battlefield they’ve never actually been in in order to justify their various stances on military issues. (Former Blue Jays coach Tim Johnson infamously did this to motivate his players and was rightfully fired for it)

We regularly weigh the opinions of ppl who have been thru experiences relating to a specific subject differently than those who have not, not that they are necessarily RIGHT, but that they have a point of view we may not have, whether that means nething to us is up to us. But we have former athletes as commentators, we have police officers and former army personnel to comment on crime and military issues. Former politicians are political analysts. Ppl even do this in the negative sense, accusing ppl of bias, accusing rape survivors of bias or being too emotional to be rational, etc etc etc… it’s funny that suddenly ppl are claiming that real lived experiences do not matter xD

Going back to David Futrelle as an example (since the OP used him), a more accurate comparison wouldn’t be if David pretended to be a woman or even a black woman or even a black trans woman (he’d still get the same treatment, rightly or wrongly) but if he had defended himself by pretending to be a disabled person w/ a long history of mental illness and then made up experiences to back up why he felt it was okay to say the words that some ppl felt were offensive. -_-;; It’s not that he would have just changed the superficial elements of how ppl viewed him, it’s that he’d have changed his background too, innately who he claimed to be, and the experiences that he claims shaped him, as well as making up experiences to back up his point of view and refute critics. I think we all agree that would be extremely dishonest if not screwed up entirely. And it would not prove nething except that ppl using made up personas can make up any experiences they want, interpret them however they want and claim to have lived them and therefore been shaped by them to fraudulently back up their opinions >:|

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Rape is bad, but not as scary as consensual sex to censors >:|

This is a great piece not just on the problems w/ the new Duke Nukem game, but how rape of women is seen as less offensive to censors' eyes than consensual sex

Well yes, obviously. But it’s not, and I agree that giving Duke an M rating despite featuring on-screen graphic rape is incredibly dismissive of the seriousness of rape. But what disturbs me even more is the kind of games that do get an AO rating in the US. The first one that jumped to my mind was Fahrenheit, which we in the US know as Indigo Prophecy. Some content was cut from Indigo Prophecy in order to avoid its initial AO rating, and that content was… a single consensual sex scene. (Well, also the shower scene shows Carla’s nipples in the non-US version.) The ESRB’s reasoning was that the sex scene was interactive, but I don’t care how interactive it is, because it doesn’t feature murdering women who are in the process of being raped. In my mind that makes it a fair bit less “adults only” than DNF.

Similar censorship occurred in the case of The Witcher. Its US release also had a lot of content cut out (all of which was later reinstated in a downloadable patch, fortunately), because there’s a hell of a lot of sex in that game. The Witcher has received criticism from some for its protagonist’s philandering ways, the way he seemingly treats women as conquests, and the way the game itself portrays those women (admittedly, there does seem to be a correlation between a woman’s breast size in the game and how likely she is to be horny for Geralt). But again, however you feel about the portrayal of sex in The Witcher, it’s all consensual. And yet that gets censored and DNF gets a pass.

Are you starting to notice a trend here? It’s almost like our culture reacts more strongly to depictions of consensual sex than it does to depictions of rape! And yes, it does, because while rape scenes may be portraying violence, consensual sex scenes are portraying women with subjectivity and agency, making sexual choices for themselves, and as we all know that’s way worse.

I think that's very much it. :\ It's the whole "don't be a slut" thing, or the constant fear of society of our girls or daughters becoming "sluts", having sex. :\ But if they're "only" raped then it's okay, b/c they didn't ask for it, they aren't "fallen" in the sense that they aren't sinning, they aren't being lustful or sinful, or slutty. :\ And well rape is bad, and these are bad guys! And rape is realistic and it happens! Rape is immoral and everybody knows it is, so what's the harm? But consensual sex will corrupt our daughters and teach them to be immoral sluts, so we have to make sure the game is AO >_<;; (TBF, I'm against video game rating systems and consumption restrictions in general, outside of maybe just describing what's in it w/o adding assumptions of age appropriateness, so parents and players can make informed decisions)

The Sucker Punch example is another good one, esp since it actually shows that the censors seem more comfortable w/ her being raped, since it's against her will, then her showing she might want it, cuz that makes her a slutty f-ed up girl and sends bad messages. The censors may say on direct questioning that rape is a worse act, but their actions suggest that consensual sex by women is to them a far worse sin.

And notice, this also saps away the agency of men. We're okay with rape, b/c well men are horny bastards neways right? They'll do what they do, it's all on the woman... if she resists and is raped, at least she keeps her moral standing, if she goes w/ it, shes' a slut, and we can't teach girls this. There is no handwringing about the moral msgs we're sending to boys about themselves or nething (b/c we all know rape is bad right? so no point there) >:| This s- also plays into the idea of rape as punishment for women who wear the wrong clothes, or acts the wrong way, that they provoked the men (who have no agency). Or the "you can't rape a slut" narratives that you heard so much as a counter to the Slutwalk protests (b/c once you want it in some situations, you are a sinful fallen woman, and you want it in all) >:| (also for all the men who are always flailing about the "false rape epidemic" and "she lied about rape to avoid being labeled a slut, shamed, etc".. (which is more often a theoretical alternative posited actually) then fighting rape culture, the idea that rape is less offensive than consensual sex, and this slut-shaming culture would actually fight what you're afraid of :3 (it doesn't make nebody who does lie about a crime maliciously less culpable of course, just like fighting rape culture doesn't mean that rapists are not culpable >:|) )

But augh... so... f-ing.. stupid >:| Our priorities and narratives as a society are so f-ed up.

Sunday, June 12, 2011

This is what you get when Ami & Trish discuss what to name the new Winnipeg NHL team xD

[05:25] Ami: The Winnipeg Rabbitohs
[05:25] Trish: XD
[05:25] Trish: "rabbitoh? what's a rabbitoh?"
[05:25] Trish: the winnipeg stej
[05:25] Ami: the winnipeg stigs
[05:25] Trish: all helmets
[05:25] Trish: all in cars
[05:26] Ami: the winnipeg daleks
[05:26] Trish: the winnipeg triumphs
[05:26] Ami: the winnipeg TARDISes
[05:27] Trish: or the winnipeg weeping angels
[05:27] Ami: the winnipeg vulcans
[05:28] Trish: they should be the winnipeg romulans
[05:28] Ami: if you stay on your side of the neutral zone, they'll stay on their side?
[05:29] Trish: or will we?
[05:29] Ami: in hockey the middle part of the rink between the 2 blue lines (that delineate the 2 defensive zones) is called the neutral zone
[05:29] Trish: o.o
[05:29] * Trish is amused
[05:30] Trish: "hey, that player shouldn't be equipped with a cloaking device!"
[05:30] Ami: xD
[05:30] Ami: so the winnipeg players are twice as big?
[05:30] Ami: or they wear twice as much equipment? but it's mostly empty space in between?
[05:31] Trish: they can enclose the other players in themselves
[05:31] Ami: oh for the romulans
[05:31] Ami: their goalie is super tall and big
[05:31] Ami: but he's got a BIIGGG hole between his legs
[05:31] Ami: where you can shoot thru
[05:32] Trish: or hide in!
[05:32] Trish: the winnipeg breen have a player for all situations
[05:35] Ami: XD
[05:35] Ami: and they all wear facial protection
[05:35] Trish: very sensibly
[05:35] Ami: the winnipeg starfleet
[05:36] Ami: they strangely wear no armour and have silly tight uniforms
[05:36] Trish: leading goalscorer name "the photon torpedo" othername
[05:36] Ami: but they have the state of the art skates and sticks
[05:36] Ami: and annoyingly they always win
[05:36] Trish: :D
[05:36] Trish: but they are usually down at halftime
[05:36] Ami: yus
[05:36] Ami: the winnipeg cardassians
[05:37] Ami: they can only shoot at the net accurately if they're 5 feet in front of it
[05:37] Trish: which is nearly never
[05:37] Ami: yus xD
[05:37] Ami: the winnipeg bajorans
[05:37] Ami: plucky and tough but not a good team
[05:38] Ami: they do however have the most powerful owners in the league
[05:38] Ami: unfortunately they are never on time for meetings
[05:38] Trish: and reputedly have an ancient history of playing hockey
[05:38] Trish: which on closer inspection is actually curling
[05:38] Ami: xD
[05:39] Trish: the winnipeg borg, team mysteriously grows larger again
[05:39] Ami: XD
[05:39] Ami: all players can play all positions
[05:39] Ami: and yours too
[05:39] Ami: however they are susceptable to falling asleep
[05:39] Trish: bring bee-gas
[05:40] Ami: winnipeg tholians
[05:40] Trish: they keep the net in front of the goal
[05:40] Ami: xD
[05:40] Ami: new rules are made for them
[05:40] Trish: the winnipeg gorn play a bloody game. :d
[05:41] Ami: referee *blows whistle*: 2 minutes for webbing!
[05:41] Trish: :D
[05:41] Ami: until the winnipeg metrons intervene
[05:41] Ami: the winnipeg organians do not let anybody play
[05:42] Trish: this will be a peaceful game
[05:42] Ami: and the winnipeg Aldeans steal the children of the opposing players
[05:42] Trish: <_<
[05:43] Ami: the winnipeg Edo play by different rules, and they won't let you know what they are
[05:44] Trish: that would be telling
[05:44] Ami: however breaking any rule results in immediate suspension unless you take it up w/ their weird and demanding god... also known as gary bettman
[05:44] Trish: and so we've come full circle
[05:45] Ami: the winnipeg ferengi are good at making money but bad at everything else AKA they're the Toronto Maple Leafs
[05:45] Trish: <_<
[05:45] Trish: they sold their end-zone for new sticks

[06:01] Ami: the winnipeg dominion
[06:02] Ami: they're the 00 pittsburgh penguins
[06:02] Ami: they bascially have 3 players and their best player is awkwardly also their owner
[06:02] Trish: =^_^=
[06:03] Trish: they also keep replacing players with suspiciously identical substitutes
[06:06] Ami: Hey that Mario Lemieux looks just like the one who retired a few years ago!

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Ami's response to angry victimblamingpants and how victim blaming/shaming culture and the idea of rape as punishment hurts us ALL

This is an amalgamation of comments I left in response to This disgusting thing where a guy says every single woman at Slutwalk deserves to be and should be raped

As a survivor, and one that fits his idea of “a real crime”… I hearby call bulls- >:| and he can claim to speak for us all he wants, but my exp w/ other survivors is that NONE of us believe his crap nor feel that other survivors of rape or sexual assault are insulting us or nething -_-;; I’m getting pretty tired of being held up as a shield by ppl trying to dismiss rape against other people (women AND men, cuz this also happens to guys too “WHAT ABOUT THE REAL SURVIVORS” as well as lots of other women).. >_>;;

It IS incredibly misandrist too -_-;;; To me the biggest thing here is even stripping away the (presumably) over the top rhetoric, he thinks RLY lowly of men and how much they love and care about their loved ones too :\ All men are rapists? Rly? They can’t control themselves? >__>;; Forget MRAs, I dun think he speaks for any man at all! I mean I doubt that any guys think of themselves as rapists, or animals, nor do they want the women in their lives to be raped either… >:O

Also I was thinking about b/c this is also something rly important to me, and I hate this attitude in our society (and something else related to the f-ed upness of hockey culture in Canada)... the victim blaming/shaming culture around rape and the idea of rape as punishment and that ppl "deserve" rape is also a major part of why ppl in our society are so tolerant w/ prison rape -_-;;

I mean we see it in TV shows all the time, the hero cops threatening perps w/ prison rape in the same way "if you don't tell me what I want to know, you'll be in jail and I can't control what ppl do to you"... and we're supposed to CHEER ON these heroes (whenever cops do this on TV I just headdesk) and IRL, with all the prison rape jokes ppl make... and when you call ppl out on it,it's the same as why ppl are okay w/ doing it on TV, or if you read the comments in newspapers when somebody goes to jail... it's OKAY b/c he or she chose to commit crimes, it's OKAY b/c they "deserve" it, it's OKAY b/c they did something bad... it's part of the punishment >:| (plus there's usually a nice helping of homophobia there too) It's OKAY b/c "you shouldn't have committed a crime in the first place" (sound familiar?) Prison rape victims are victims too, and they're NO LESS victims just b/c of what they've done, or what you thought they should have done, or shouldn't have done... and as usual, we act like the RAPISTS just kinda are... they're uncontrollable animals that are convenient for us to use as threats and leverage and punishment >:O

And it's NOT okay >:O And nobody DESERVES rape. And rape is not and should never be used as "punishment" or a "threat" to get what we want >:O And so this is an example of how something RLY important to so many ppl to fight is also srsly affected by victim blaming and seeing rape as punishment >:|

The other thing I was thinking of is the case of David Frost, the sports agent who recruited many talented junior hockey players and allegedly raped them and forced them to have sex with him, each other, and girls (and forced the girls too). >:O The problem was that b/c he was such a hero to the community, nobody would testify against him, and even some of his victims were too scared to b/c of the victim shaming attitudes and him being a hero and also the implication that admitting that would be admitting you're gay >_<;;

The girls were not added by the Crown as complainants b/c they thought it would hurt their case, but they DID testify against him and what happened, but they got ripped to shred on cross for being sluts, for being "puck bunnies" (i.e. hockey groupies) and for wanting some of the sex (with the boys). The victim blaming and slut shaming to discredit them WORKED and Frost was found Not Guilty of raping THE BOYS UNDER HIS TRUST >:O So there's another case where slut shaming, victim blaming, etc etc can have an even bigger impact than ppl may think >:| These attitudes and myths and LIES hurt us ALL, and it has lasting REAL effects that harm real people when we go along w/ it, when we perpetrate it and when we perpetuate it. >:O

Friday, June 10, 2011

Great post and example of the soft "no girls allowed" sign on superhero comics culture that we've been railing about >:3

This is a great post about the soft "no girls allowed" sign in male comics culture and stores (HT to Trish for showing me this :3 )

She's so right too... and I feel like this a lot, tho not in terms of stores not taking my money. I think the stores here having adapted to the Manga trend has helped a lot in that regard, and in the stores being more welcoming, lit and friendly :) (tho sometimes that's just the front where the DVDs and Mangas are, I know a few stores with a 2nd room that looks just like some of the other cavey stores where the non-mangas are stored >_> ) Altho I still get ignored by ppl there, or condescended if I try to offer my opinion on nething... :|

I was on a date once where we went to a comic store, and I was there to help introduce HIM to comics, and yet everybody talked to him like he must be the expert and I'm the silly girl -_-;;; But I mean, in terms of how our concerns and voices in the greater community are treated, and in the business, and in the stories in terms of treatment of CoCs, women, queer ppl, etc... I, like her, wonder "why am I bothering? why must I beg and plead for them to give me something, just nething amidst the sea of titles and chars they have, for me to give them my money. Money I'd be more than happy to give over. :\ Why should I put up w/ the crumbs I get, feel glad when we get a little gesture thrown our way, no matter how flawed, settle for finding the bits of inspiration amidst the racism and sexism and other -isms?"

And well, I decided that I'm not bothering... (as ppl prolly have noticed) to the point that the DC reboot just surprised me when somebody talked about it... xD I just dun care about ppl who dun care about me, not as an individual fan, but who I am in terms of being non-white, female, queer, etc... -_-;;

This is the part of her post that rly hammers the point home btw:

But that was more than fifteen years ago. Things have changed. I've seen the campaigns online. I've seen the maps of girl-friendly comic book stores. (Although, seriously, just that these exist is an indication of a major problem in the industry; you don't see maps of girl-friendly hardware stores, for example, because all hardware stores are girl-friendly. They employ women! They take our money! They provide us with non-condescending advice! They have gloves in our size! At least all the ones I've been in, and I'm a homeowner, so you can see that I spend a lot of time in hardware stores. The question isn't, "Which hardware store will treat me like a person despite my gender?" It's, "Which hardware store is closest to my house and stocks the items I need?" If you have to ask the former question, there is a big problem.) I've even read articles about how to get girls into your comic book shop, so clearly owners now understand that accepting money from only a fraction of the people interested in giving it to you is not always the world's most successful business strategy.

That's why, yesterday, I decided to stop into a comic book store. Totally on a whim. Just to see what it's like in there these days, how things have changed since the days of dialup. I thought I might want to get something with Oracle in it, to remember her by.

I walked in towing my unwilling three-year-old son, who had already come to the conclusion that this was a destination unlikely to have any trucks or Pigeon books in it, and therefore did not wish to go in. I blinked, letting my eyes adjust, and, man, comic book store interiors really haven't changed that much. I mean, the posters have - I think they've developed new breast enlarging technology, for starters, and it's not like the breasts were small before - but the interiors are still exactly the same.

"Hi!" the guy behind the counter said in cheerful tones, and I thought: But they have changed where it really matters.

Except he wasn't looking at me. He was looking at my son, who was clinging to my leg. "What can I find for you today?" he asked him. "Spiderman? Superman? Toys?"

"We're here for me," I said. "He's too young for comic books."

"You're never too young for comic books!" he said, still exclusively addressing the earthling. "I bet you like superheroes, huh?" (He doesn't.)

The earthling, apparently feeling threatened, asked to be picked up. I eavesdropped on a few more minutes of conversation that didn't involve me, even though I was the only member of my party willing to talk, and then I left. I pretty much had to; the earthling, distressed by this onslaught of talking despite all his Mama's attempts to redirect the conversation, had his face buried in my neck and was saying, "All done, all done, go home now?" very quietly into my ear. But in the time I was in the store, not one single word was addressed to me, let alone enough words to ask me, say, if there was anything I needed help finding. The guy never even looked at me. I was still invisible.

The only thing that's changed in fifteen years, apparently, is that I gave birth to someone who can be my passport into comic book stores. Except he doesn't want to be, and I don't want him to have to be, so that isn't going to work so well. I'm going to have to remember Oracle with icons and scans and fan fiction, instead of something that costs actual money.

But, hey, reboots happen regularly, and I'm sure Oracle will be coming around again. Eventually. So I'll see you in another decade or so, comic book store guys! In the meantime, thanks for keeping my money in my purse, where it belongs.

Yeah that's basically how it was w/ my date that time too. -_-;; I think it's abs ridic that guy didn't even LISTEN to her, he just kept talking to her child, cuz well a) it has to be for him and b) he's a boy, he MUST like comic books, or must be targeted to like them.

It's a nice little example of the greater issue we've all been railing about -_-;; It's not just not believing that we could like comics, it's not CARING whether we do, but believing it's the destiny of every boy to, that this is some sort of innate thing and that the companies must target them b/c they might be able to be turned, while there's a WHOLE BUNCH of women and girls (and PoCs, disabled ppl, queer ppl, etc) waving our arms at them... but we're not as important, and our love of comics and our love of having powerful avatars with amazing powers who overcome all sorts of things, aren't as important, aren't as true, and aren't as understandable -_-;; They might as well retcon us out too.

(also just as a random thing, Rogue was my favourite X-Men hero too b/c I associated with her SO much, for the reasons listed by the OP and also for some other personal reasons :3 )

A good post, with Ami caveats :]

This is a good and passionate post by Ozymandias on men's issues

The list at the top esp is rly great, and it's also things that lots of feminists have been saying for SO LONG too and I've seen written about in so many blogs and such :] (but hopefully since this is going viral, this time it won't be ignored by ppl who need to believe what they need to believe about feminism -_-)

Tho I dun agree w/ her entirely on what feminism isn't doing... as usual, it's about who represents feminism? o_O All of the feminist blogs and comms I read or belong to care a lot about this stuff (and I've blogged a lot about this stuff in my blog too :3 ) and I know from my job that there are lots of feminists and feminist organizations out there who ARE working on helping boys and men, on working with and running shelters and other agencies... people are actually doing this, a lot of ppl, out in the real world :) I can attest to that first hand.

As usual, it's always a debate on who represents feminism, what feminism is etc etc (as it is w/ issues about WoCs, trans ppl, disabled ppl and others) and I ttlly get when ppl use the general "feminism" in their criticism, and I've seen it w/ trans activists and etc... but it's not my style :] I tend to be specific like saying "trans-exclusionary feminists", but at the same time I get the idea of "dominant narratives" (tho sometimes there's a difference between what's a dominant narrative inside a movement or philosophy and what's a dominant narrative that outsiders, or the media have about that movement)... it's something I disagree with her about, but it's a minor quibble b/c I think we actually both agree but have different word choices xD I doubt she's saying ALL feminists or even MOST feminists don't care, or haven't written about it, or aren't doing work about it IRL, it's just a powerful rhetorical tool :] (I just worry that some ppl will flash it around for their own purposes, but then again ppl do that w/ everything dun they xD )

By the way this isn't me saying there are NO feminists like that or there aren't a LOT of feminists like that who dun care or think about men's issues (like w/ trans-exclusionary feminists, or white feminists who don't care about WoCs). I'm pretty sure there's prolly a ton -_-;; And I hope they listen up! B/c like everything else about intersectionality and anti-oppression, if you're not paying attn to everything going on, your ability to properly find solutions or ideas to fix things will be severely limited, if not useless >_<;; I also hope the MRAs listen up obv >:| Esp the rly hateful misogynist ones b/c... FFS... we're not even at "non-intersectionality" with those, we're at outright hatred and threats of violence. >:|

But a lot of what she said in that list rly rings true, esp about the zero sum game stuff. Which also applies to WHERE oppression comes from. :] I've been complaining about violence against boys, bullying, pressures on boys to succeed in sports, to accept violence in sports (while girls are not ALLOWED to accept those risks even if they consent to it) and etc (thing I'd want to add to that list is pushing boys to take steroids) and esp since there's SO much that intersects too... I mean women's issues are men's issues and men's issues are women's issues... they all link together... boys taught to hold in anger, to express only "manly" emotions which exclude pain, tears, etc, isn't healthy to ANYBODY, either themselves or ppl they interact w/ (men and women)... :\

Bullying is not a good way for a child to grow up. "Boys will be boys" teaches terrible lessons to everybody -_-;; And also issues like how the various ways these kyriarchical ideas (yus Virginia, there is no Feminist Conspiracy oppressing boys, it's all from the same mass of crap that oppresses everybody -_-;;) intersect when it comes to trans ppl. (for ex a LOT of those things she wrote about are things I experienced in my childhood too :\ even tho I wasn't a boy, I was PERCEIVED as one... and a lot of it also ties into misogyny... things that are regarded as female or "feminine" are bad, and if they are in boys, that is attacked, cuz it's weakness.. which is why feminism and fighting these attitudes are part of the solution :) )

Neways, I think this was a rly good post, and I hope that ppl (esp many anti-feminists) get what she's trying to say, and esp the part about oppression not being a zero sum game :] I'm rly worried some ppl will read it and go "SEE SEE MEN ARE THE MOST OPPRESSED, YOU WOMEN HAVE ALL THESE PRIVILEGES AND WE NEED TO FIGHT FEMINISM AND THE MATRIARCHY" as if, b/c men face crap from our sexist patriarchical society (and a lot of it related to malehood being "not womanhood" i.e. women are bad, weak, soft,... and those attitudes for what it means to be a man is becoming more extreme too :\ Like in hockey as I write a lot about... the fear that allowing women to check will make men women, and so not only are women NOT checking, boys are being pushed to check at earlier and earlier ages even if they dun want to) therefore it must be actually a feminist run society against men... that doesn't rly follow -_-;;;

The world isn't a gender war... it's not "us" vs "them" or "you" vs "me"... we have a common enemy and gender roles hurt us all, in different ways, to different degrees... and it DOESN'T MEAN YOU ARE NOT SUFFERING to acknowledge that women DO face oppression, and marginalization and other problems that may affect us to a greater degree. :] And as Ozymandias says, we need to pay attention also that boys and men also face legitimate issues cuz of stuff like gender roles and our kyriarchical society... and acknowledge and understand how intersectionality plays into all of this. I just hope that ppl do understand it's not a zero sum game, and caring about THESE issues as well, don't distract, but ADD to the understanding and caring about misogyny, transphobia, homophobia, racism, ablism, classism, etc :]

Caring isn't a zero sum game :)

ETA: I'm also uncomfortable w/ the Wernher von Braun reference.. I get that it was a joke, and based on a song lyric and she was aware of the Godwin, but I think it's in pretty poor taste -_-

Tuesday, June 07, 2011

Ami briefly reviews and mostly expounds on her thoughts on X-Men First Class and Mystique :)

I made a (imo) better version of this before but youtube cut it off at the 8 minute mark, so I made 2 new 8 minute videos -_-;; Cuz of how rushed I felt I forgot to include that I thought the movie racefailed too with the 2 CoCs they had and what they did to them -_-;;; But I still rly enjoyed it, but as usual I have thoughts and qualms about it :) A lot of this has to do with Mystique and how much I associated w/ her.. I hope I got everything I wanted to say down... I forgot what I said earlier :(

Neways so that is my thoughts (somewhat personal) on the movie! :D

Wednesday, June 01, 2011

Awesome Rinoa is awesome :D

I dun remember if I ever posted this here or not, but I want to show it to a friend, and I need to embed it apparently xD And it's awesomely cute so I want to share it w/ everybody else as well so here you go :D It is a video taken a while back of how my cat (Rinoa :D ) chases her tail xD (she's very clever, she even gets it for a while here! xD )

Ami & Trish chat Trek Star :D

Context is for the weak >_>;;

[05:32] Ami Angelwings: THAT's a no win scenario
[05:32] Ami Angelwings: and that's something a starfleet captain has to deal with
[05:33] Ami Angelwings: same with troi's scenario in TNG
[05:33] Ami Angelwings: where she had to order geordi to his death
[05:33] Ami Angelwings: esp since that's the one thing kirk couldn't do in ST2
[05:33] Ami Angelwings: and spock did for him
[05:34] Trish: and then cheated
[05:34] Ami Angelwings: at the expense of kirk's son
[05:34] Trish: a good GM finds consequences. >_>
[05:34] Ami Angelwings: xD
[05:34] Ami Angelwings: the whale scenario must have caught the players off guard
[05:35] Ami Angelwings: or caught the GM off guard
[05:35] Ami Angelwings: "hahaha what are you gonna do now?"
[05:35] Ami Angelwings: "go back in time!"
[05:35] Ami Angelwings: "wait you can't do that!"
[05:35] Trish: XD
[05:36] Trish: of course they could have just gone to the guardian of forever
[05:36] Trish: but it would have been difficult bringing the whale back thru
[05:36] Ami Angelwings: xD
[05:36] Ami Angelwings: c'mon, just a little more
[05:36] Ami Angelwings: PUSH PEOPLE
[05:36] Ami Angelwings: put your back into it!
[05:37] Trish: bet that's why they didn't use the guardian in the movie
[05:37] Ami Angelwings: the whales anguished screams are heard across the galaxy
[05:37] Trish: of course tomorrow is yesterday provides the alternate method which they used
[05:37] Ami Angelwings: the probe rushes in , beams the whale out and blows the planet up
[05:37] Trish: everybody wins!
[05:37] Ami Angelwings: they stopped using the guardian
[05:38] Ami Angelwings: when they began to realize he only sent you back to time periods where you could cause the rise of the nazis
[05:38] Trish: *sporfles*
[05:39] Ami Angelwings: *steps on a squirrel*
[05:39] Ami Angelwings: *Nazi future*
[05:39] Ami Angelwings: what again!?
[05:39] Trish: XD
[05:39] Ami Angelwings: *kills all nazis*
[05:39] Ami Angelwings: *Nazi future*