Saturday, May 31, 2008

Comic Ami is comicful! :D

Apparently the Wizard convention thingie is right next to the Transhealth conference! :D that's convenient! XDD Ppl also keep coming into our conference thinking it's the other one XD

I also took pics with and kissed Stormtroopers today! It was fun! :D XD

Neways since Rob is gonna be there tomorrow, I'm gonna drop in for a few hours too! :D YAY! :]

So if nebody else is there see if you can spot me! xDDD

<3 Teh Travelling Ami

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Travelling Ami is travelling :D

Meow! And in some hours I will be leaving for the Trans Health Conference in Philadelphia! :D Yay! :]

I'm kinda worrying about crossing the border tho cuz my ID is still my old male ID :( It should be fine tho! :D But I do hate looking at that picture :(

If I get a chance I'll blog from there and talk about nething interesting I might have on my brain or that I got from the conference! :D

Oh and if nebody else is also going, look for me, we can hang out or just say hi or w/e! :DDD

*excited and nervous and catlike* :3


Wednesday, May 28, 2008

What? You dun want to sell your soul to Tokyopop? What are you? French?

I found out about this from Rachel :]

Nice try, Tokyopop

Srsly!? -_-

And they have to do the "HAY GUISE WE'RE NORMAL PPL LIKE J00" thing which is SO CREEPY, esp since it lays out just what kind of snakeoil they're trying to sell you, but hay they're on UR side, not like those SKETCHY FRENCH PPL (that part is my favourite part, with the whole MORAL RIGHTS IS A WEIRD FRENCH TERM, YOU DUN LIKE TEH FRENCH RITE? WE HAVE OUR OWN WAYS OF DEALING WITH CREDIT!!! LIKE NOT GIVING IT TO YOU CUZ OTHERWIZE WE'D BE TEH FRENCH)


It seems like they're rly aiming at younger creators and hoping that some of them would be so blinded by the stars in their eyes and the prospect of being famous and having their idea be huge or something that they wun even read it or wun care about what might happen in the future with their credit or idea or nething else. :( Or hoping that some ppl might just think this is just "how things are done" and y'know they see so much stuff they like from Tokyopop that they think this is just what everybody does and it's normal and okay and safe and it'll make them "official" :( Or the ppl who might be scared and lost about how to get published and be suckered in by the "we're not scary lawyers, we're friendly ppl" approach :\

After all, they're Tokyopop, regular guise like you and me, not sleezy hollywood types or nething! e_e;; YOU CAN TRUST THEM!!!

I hope nobody's signed it or at least that they read it thoroughly and know wtf they're getting into. >:O


I'm rly upset about something else in my life right now, so I can't rly get coherent thoughts about this, but I wanted to blog about this cuz it's just so gross to me and UGH >:| But hay, at least they're not French!

I AM curious to hear from my creator friends and those involved in the business about this tho :D *looks at David innocently* :)

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

"I'm happy!" "No you're not." "You're right!" *kill kill kill* XDDD

Best. Movie. Summary. Evar. XDDD

Also surprisingly accurate :o

I SUPPOSE you should watch this first to set up the joke, but I prefer just not knowing wtf is going on xD

And this one is great too :D Everybody's so happy! :D

Until they die D:



OMG!! >:O

Srsly!? Let's teach kids to be bullies and ostracize ppl that dun fit in or who aren't like them early on! >:|

But the state attorney's office concluded the matter did not meet the criteria for emotional child abuse

I dunno what the legal criteria is, but in my book that's emotional child abuse! >:O Srsly, getting all his classmates to deride him in front of the others and then holding a vote to kick him out of the class!?

I mean I dun blame the kids at all, I BLAME THE TEACHER!!!! There's enuf problems with bullying and a teacher decides to make it an official thing!?

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH >:O This makes me so mad! >:|

I mean here in Ontario we're alrdy dealing with all this fallout from our government relisting GRS, and all the cisppl making the issue all about them and saying that we dun matter, we're mentally ill, that we dun need it, that we're freaks and abominations, that it's not like GID is life threatening (me and my suicide attempts would like a talk with you) and the newspapers publishing only letters (pro and con) from cisppl (and we've been writing >:O ) and not even bothering to ask transppl how WE feel. Cuz it doesn't matter. The majority is all that matters, even if it doesn't directly affect them at all >:O

And this happens with so many other groups in society too, this attitude of "well there's more of us than you and we dun like you and find you weird, so you lose, we get to decide your fate and your place in our society" >:O

And now we have teachers promoting and endorsing exclusion and mockery of ppl who dun fit in! >:O

*throws things*

Sunday, May 25, 2008


I have never actually seen one of our new 50 dollar bills before. I didn't know they put The Famous Five on it :OO I find this neat xD I'm looking at the 50 I got for my birthday in my hand right now XD That is SO cool! :D

Also it's pink <3

Love My Life! :DDDDDD (And I do! :D)

This is the music video for Love My Life :D The movie I talked about in my Super Short Reviews :] It is SOOOO sweet :D And the song is AWESOME too! :DDDD I associate rly strongly with Ichiko (the shorter one with longer hair) :D

The video is dedicated to somebody I like :D (she doesn't know it tho xD And I doubt she feels the same way back D: So it will remain hidden forever!!! xD I send sekrit <3s tho! :DDD )

Ami's love meter is at 40/100, you must buy her a teddy bear to see the next scene xD

This amuses me greatly XD

I remember Owesome saying that some 'Nice Guys'™ see interactions with women as a hentai dating sim and expect to be rewarded for completing the "necessary" tasks/verbal compliments, and that comic just reminded me of the analogy. XDDD

The next one is great too! XDD I hate that trope also, and that non-defensive violence by women against men is supposed to be hilarious and not to be taken srsly b/c women are not to be taken srsly and the implication is that we cannot rly do much harm neways :( And that attitude adds to the stigma that many battered men face b/c there's this idea that a woman cannot rly hurt a man physically, or that a man cannot rly be negatively affected or significantly harmed by violence from a woman. :( And the "smart girl/dumb guy" trope bugs me too, esp since it's everywhere >:O

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Elmo vs Vegeta: The Ultimate Battle :O


As a former huge fan of wrestling, I found this so amusing! :D Esp how Elmo did all those finishers at the end! XDD I was actually hoping for a Sharpshooter finish but the Canadian Destroyer was just as good :D

Yay Elmo!!!! :DD Vegeta was AWESOME as a heel btw, with all the right actions and stuff :D And we know he was holding back neways. xD

But still, Hulkamania Elmo > all XD

Friday, May 23, 2008


Okay, to all my lawyery friends! :D


YOU MUST*!!! It is one of the ten new laws in the book of Ami! >:D (the others require ppl to fetch me various foods and cute fluffy aminals :D )

Srsly tho :O Best legal case evar :o

I wonder what it was about :O



*you may substitute in the case of Goku vs Vegeta if you like or Ami vs Insanity xD

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Girls can be Jedi too! :D

I watch amateur lightsabre fights on youtube when I'm bored. XD I rly like this one b/c it's got the costumes and great music and stuffs :D Also b/c so many of the lightsabre fight videos you see online are of guys, and it's nice to see one that has women! :D Yay us! :] I was always sad that Aayla Secura and Shaak Ti and the other Jedi women never got any real parts in the movies :(

Shaak Ti is also my favourite char to use in Lego Star Wars! :D Also Luminara! :D Tho I still wish Aayla was in the first game :( I like Aayla :D She's very blue :]

Neways, I always wanted to be a Jedi and have a lightsabre growing up so this was rly fun to watch :D Of course my lightsabre would be pink! XDDD Or blue :O I always wanted 2 :] One short one and one long one. I could use the short one for blocking and stabbing :D

I want a pink lightsabre now D:

*stab stab* >:3

Materialistic Ami is materialistic xDD But also fun! :DDD

Like I mentioned earlier, today I bought knit strawberry earrings! :D What I forgot to mention tho was that I also bought a Wonder Woman mug! :D And it was 20% off! :] Yay!!! XDDDD

I took some pix of both the earrings and mug and I am going to share them with you! :D

Aren't they teh awesome!? :OOO

Now I have a Wonder Woman mug to go with my Supergirl mug! :D

Also they go with my giant giraffe and router cat! :DDDD

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Mortal Kombat vs DC :OOO

Mortal Kombat vs DC!???



On one hand, I'm wondering when time shifed and it's the 90s again when Mortal Kombat was at it's most popular and the Marvel/Xmen vs Capcom/Street Fighter games were coming out. XDDD I remember saying that there should be a Midway/MK vs DC game back then XDD





Maybe this will finally be a decent fighting game involving DC chars! :DDDD

Batman in a fantasy martial arts fighting game just makes SO MUCH SENSE!!!



Cuz I wuv Kitana ;-; She is teh awesome and by far my favourite char evar :O I fell in luff with her the second I saw her in MK2 *-* I'm not a huge MK fan neways... 2 was rly the only one I rly liked, but... Kitana is spesho and transcends all :DDD


Or maybe Kitana and Wonder Woman or Kitana and BLACK CANARY!!!! :O They would rule :DDDDD

But I think I will still stick with Kitana and Kara :D The killer Ks! Perfect for Kombat! :D

I hope it's good ;-; The preview looks decent :)

Will the DC heroes have fatalities tho!? :o They're not supposed to kill :( Maybe they will have heroalities!!! :D

Also would DC let it's chars be in a game where there ARE fatalities or where Batman's heart could get ripped out or Superman's or something? :O Or will this be more than just DC chars imported into an MK game, and actually not follow an MK style of game or something. :O Now I'm curious :ooo

And since it's the 90s again, you must all wear 90s clothes and listen to 90s music nao! >:O

mewmewmewmewmewmewmewmewmewmewmewmew *runs around in circles* XDDDDDDD


I'm not even a Spoiler fan (I got into comics after she died :( ) and that made me happy :) And that was also rly sweet and nice in general, just from reading it :)

Also nice cover there Bruce ;)

They fixed her and Leslie in one fell swoop and acknowledged (and fixed by removing the need for a memorial) one of the big things fans have been griping about! :D

*cheers* Better than a memorial! :D

Now I wonder what Spoiler's political affiliation will be :O

I vote Lowercasist! :D And Totally Awesome Feminist! xD And Hello Kittyist! And of course Amiist! xDD

And umm... super fuzzy warm luff of doomist! :D



That is the best kind of political affiliation! :D IT SHALL RULE US ALL.

I know, I know, Ami is insane and must be stopped xD


Also the cats! :D

And bunnies :O

Also I got bunny earrings today! xDDD And Hello Kitty shaped earrings (srsly! xD) Oh oh!! AND GIANT KNIT STRAWBERRY EARRINGS (SRSLY SRSLY) :DDDD

And I drank a lot of coffee and hot chocolate and bubble tea... can you tell? xD

I'm infinitely amused that Librarian is leading the poll! :D

Obviously, America needs a Librarian Party XDDDDD

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Attn Guyz: Heterosexuality is a house of cards that can collapse at any time xD

To all my (remaining) heterosexual male friends:

You're Welcome.


Monday, May 19, 2008

Ami's Skrull readership is up :O

Apparently I have a lot of ppl who may or may not be Skrulls reading my blog :O *looks at you suspiciously*

Also some Borg o_o

I like how me being clearly insane is tied for first tho! XDDDD

That makes me happy :D Cuz we all know I am :O *runs around flailing* :D

Neways I have a new idea for a poll. xD It should be up soon (if not by the time you read this xD)

*head hits desk*

Dan Didio's next brilliant event idea: DC heroes fight over partisan politics


Ugh >_<;;;

What a bad idea :(

Thursday, May 15, 2008

This has been a good day :)

The California Supreme Court has struck down the same-sex marriage ban!

Yay! :D

Also also also:

Ontario is going to cover GRS under our health care system again!!!

YAY!!!!!!!!!!! :D



FINALLY!!! Of course, now the various transphobic groups will come out as they did before, when the Liberals were going to re-list it, saying that it's just a comestic thing, and how come they dun cover other stuff, and tax payers money etc etc... :\

*sighs* But the number of ppl who use it each year is SO small it costs the province SO LITTLE. >:|

The Liberals have a huge majority in parliament tho, so this should pass :]

I've been saving up for it... but now I might not need to? :D

The worrisome part tho is that ppl have to be approved via CAMH (aka the place with Zucker and Blanchard) and go thru "very, very sustained psychological evaluations" :( Not looking forward to that D:

At least it's a step in the right direction :) And maybe they are just saying that to put ppl at ease? :) Hopefully..

All in all, this has been a good day :]

Altho here is some dumb news (most ppl prolly alrdy have heard of this, but it is dumb enuf I need to mention it xD):

Warner/DC comics shuts down children's cancer charity auction over trademark

Bravo WB, bravo.

I mean srsly... >.>;; I know blah blah copyright... but shutting down a CHARITY AUCTION!? >:| SRSLY? Like... awesome PR job WB!

I feel so bad for their PR ppl :( They must be like "OMG, how.. how are we gonna spin this?" x_x;;

Edit: For the GRS headline (Ontario will resume coverage of sexual reassignment surgery: Smitherman), I actually read it too fast and thought it said:

Ontario will resume coverage of sexual reassignment surgery: Superman


I can just imagine him developing super surgery as a power now xD OMG... now I'm scared ;-;

Ami needs YOU to help with a macro :D

Me and Trish were talking last night and she said we need a macro of Superman that says "SUPERMAN DOES NOT APPROVE" xD

Zhinxy likes this idea too, but she said we need just the RIGHT panel for it and she's right...

so I'm putting it out here :D Does nebody have any ideas for what would be a good panel/picture/cover for this macro? :D

We will give you cats if you please us :]

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

A bug where all Amis weren't automatically super cute has been fixed :]

That would be AWESOME :O

Edit: :O A creation story

How NOT to get ppl on your side >:|

Outside where I work is a large memorial for fire fighters who have lost their lives in the line of duty. :(


Like.. WTF. >:O



Fire fighters aren't political.. like AT ALL! They just save ppl :) Many are volunteers!

Who hates fire fighters? o_O

Ppl should not be vandalizing memorials PERIOD. But I just dun get WHY nebody would have a problem with FIRE FIGHTERS! >.<;; ESP DEAD FIRE FIGHTERS WHO DIED SAVING AND HELPING PPL!!!!


Here's a news story about it

I actually saw a lot of the news crews around today, that's why I was wondering what was going on and saw the vandalism :O


From what it sounds like, this is the work of some IDIOT who thought he was taking a pot shot at our Premier (Dalton McGuinty) by um... desecrating a memorial for fire fighters.

WAY2GO idiotbox jerkface >:O

Friday, May 09, 2008

Second verse, a little better than the first :)

This is better, sort of :)

At least it tells a happy story, and makes me smile so much! :D

On the other hand they STILL GET THE PRONOUNS WRONG! They stopped editting what the parents say to force in male pronouns but they KEEP using male pronouns even after acknowledging a) the parents refer to their DAUGHTER with FEMALE pronouns b) their DAUGHTER has changed her name and identifies as a girl.

Which IS WHAT I HATE! Ppl who aren't versed in trans issues who read these articles will get the impression that well yus, ppl may CALL the transperson one thing, but rly we should refer to them with birth sex pronouns and with the birth sex name. It infers that this is all in our heads, that to it's NOT our identity, it's kinda just like we're crazy and wanna be called "Sir Stanfield of Nottingshire" or something and our friends and family humour us.


If her name is VIOLET SAY VIOLET! You can include a note saying "Violet was born male with a male name, but identifies as female, and therefore we will be referring to her with female pronouns and by her chosen name" if you're so worried about readers being confused.

I mean what's so bad about that? Then there's no confusion! >:O

The parents are great tho and delaying her puberty :) I hope she starts HRT and stuff and gets the life she wants :D Also sticking with her for school and everything!

Yay! :]

Still mad at the paper tho.

kids who are more than effeminate boys or masculine girls who may turn out to be gay in adulthood.

Let's stop linking gender and sexual preference k? >.> There are plenty of "effeminate" straight boys and "masculine" straight girls too. >:O And if you're gonna stick the "may" in there, you might as well just not include it and then it'd look A LOT better.

Also that they decide to give the nutjobs a say again...

Polly Carmichael, a British psychologist who works at the Portman Clinic in London, which has a unit specifically dedicated to gender identity, says the identity of most children this age is in constant flux.

"You can have a child who is presenting with absolute certainty, but it may be that at a later point they will decide that is not in fact what they want and their feelings may indeed change," Carmichael says.

The Portman clinic has treated 124 kids since 1989. It requires children to live as the gender they were born with. And 80 percent of its patients — once grown — chose as adults to keep their biological gender.

Ok, I was 7 in 1989, I didn't come out to MYSELF until I was almost 24. *I* would have been one of the 80% as far as she knows, and I didn't even have to go thru this bs treatment of being FORCED to live as the gender I was born with (and prolly pushed in many other Zuckeresque ways to train me and condition me to stay male using guilt and fear and other beatsticks)! >:O

So I call complete and utter BS on that stat. Even WITHOUT "treatment", ppl force themselves to repress and hide themselves and who they are well into their 20s and 30s. :\ Prolly all of the children she's treated are at most in their mid 20s right now. That stat means NOTHING >:O As I said, it could have even been applied to me a couple years ago >:o

The opposite outcome was seen by the researchers in the Netherlands who first developed the hormone-blocking treatment. They have treated 100 patients and all chose — as adults — to live as the opposite sex.

This seems a little more right to me since it gave the kids a CHOICE and wasn't trying to coerce the children to choose a certain gender. :) Maybe the children will choose to de transition later but at least they chose the course of their lives rather than were coerced and forced into it, by treatment, by the stigma of society, by their own shame and fears :(

So the verdict is still out about how many kids with gender identity disorder will choose sexual reassignment as adults — that is, to live as a member of the opposite sex by changing physical appearance or by having a sex change operation.

Um, thx NPR. Let's invite the flat-earth ppl to the debate too and say the "verdict is still out" on a round Earth. >:|

I hate how they feel that to be "fair" and "unbiased" they have to let the "we can fix trannies cuz they're broken" crowd into an article that's ABOUT TRANSCHILDREN and their experiences! >:O If we have an article about vegetarianism, do we have to let the anti-veggies (hehehe XD) have a bit too? Or if we talk about the gay pride parade, should we be also giving space to the ex-gay/anti-gay crowd and saying "the verdict is still out".

It may be progress (over articles purely talking about how sick transppl are), but it's STILL stupid >:O

Also can we plz get some coverage of FtMs too? Why is it always the MtFs? Is it cuz the "boys in dresses" thing is so much harder for society to swallow and makes a better "OMG LOOK" story than "girls in pants"? >:O

And you dun NEED to have surgery. You should only choose surgery if you WANT it, not b/c ppl say you NEED it to live as your chosen gender. You dun! >:| And that's part of the hilarity of the gender essentialists like Zucker and stuff... they want to "cure" you but if you DO go with it, they insist you HAVE to get surgery or they wun help you. >:O

This makes deciding on treatment very difficult, because there is one very serious side effect to the second part of the treatment.

Taking testosterone or estrogen immediately after blocking puberty will make a teenage patient sterile.

Speaking only for myself. I'd rather live as an infertile woman than a fertile man. :] I can adopt.

I know for many ppl tho it is very important for them and some have their eggs or sperm frozen so they can have children of their own later. Some can't afford to tho. :( But ultimately it is still THEIR decision on what to do with their lives and their body.

Spack, however, is quick to point out that there is no risk of infertility from the hormone-blocking treatment alone. Infertility only comes when the hormone-blocking treatment is paired with Stage 2, the use of opposite-sex hormones. And so, Spack says, hormone blockers should really be seen simply as a treatment that gives families more time to think about what to do.

"It's a lot different to be talking to a 14-, 15-, 16-year-old about the implications of this than a 10- to 12-year-old," he says. "And so it buys you time ... without the tremendous fear of their body getting out of control."

*nodnods* So again they have choice :) They get to decide what they want, and to think about this.

Yus, ppl will argue "but they might regret it!" They might regret NOT transitioning too. The damage from puberty and stuff is hard to reverse. And to me, no cisperson has the right to tell us that these children dunno what they're getting into. THEY have NO idea what it's like to fear puberty b/c it means the development of the wrong secondary sex characteristics, to have your body change into the gender you're not, irreversably in many ways. To be a girl and grow facial and body hair and an adam's apple and have your voice deepen. To be a guy and grow breasts? >:O And to have to live with these changes?

These are not SMALL things! >:O I've spend hundreds on laser hair removal and I'm lucky. I had the money and I didn't have that much hair compared to some ppl. I'm still spending money on electrolysis to finish it off. Many other transwomen spend thousands on hair removal over YEARS.

We won't get into my voice. :(

So I have no patience for any cisperson who tells transchildren that they dunno what they're choosing.

They DO know. They know FULL well, and it's their body and THEIR CHOICE TO MAKE. >:O

In terms of how Violet thinks about hormone blockers, her older sister, Melina, says that the problem of puberty is very much on her mind. "She's getting hair in some places and stuff and ... every day she says that she feels a little bit more manly. Which is really hard for her."

Melina, who is 14, says she sometimes thinks about what it would be like if she woke up every day to a body that was slowing turning male. If she were growing in ways that felt alien and frightening.

:) I rly like this part b/c Melina is awesome (and hay they used Violet's proper name!) and she's very right. :(

Even now I worry about being manly. My hairline was receding before I got hormones. Thankfully it's grown back.. but do you know how that felt!? And then my t-blockers stopped for a bit, I started growing some of my facial hair I zapped away back... and just... IT FREAKED ME OUT.

Even just knowing the t-blockers fail, every day was another day with the wrong hormones flowing thru my body! And it hurt me SO much just to think and worry about it! :(

And every transperson's experiences are different. Some ppl are very dysphoric, other ppl not so, some ppl only want low dose hormones, or did not hate puberty, for others it feels like a death sentence. The point tho is that it's OUR body and OUR identity and OUR feelings OUR choice and nobody elses! >:O

"To go through the process of the gender that you're really not ... that must be the most scariest most disgusting thing ... I can't even imagine what that's like," she says.

*double nods*

It is.. horrifying :( To have your body change in ways that are anathema to you... and to be aware of it and have a choice at that age, before it begins... I didn't think I had a choice... if I did, it would be even SCARIER to be faced with it. :( So to those idiot cisdoctors, plz dun think we dunno what we're dealing with. We do. It's you who don't. You don't know how we feel. And you have no right to tell us what to do with our bodies and our lives, b/c ultimately we're the ones who are going to have live it! >:O

I am so glad that there are these wonderful doctors out there that do give children the choice, that treatment exists to delay puberty so they CAN make that choice. :)

I'm so happy that Violet gets to choose tho (and she has SUCH a wonderful and supportive family :) )! :] And I hope one day SOON, all transgendered children will get the same choice. :)

Hilarious NYT, just hilarious >.>;;;

WTF NY Times? WTF?

The studio also has the newly opened “Made of Honor,” which is being sold with the pretty face of Patrick Dempsey and the tag line “It takes a real man to become a maid of honor.” In brief, “Made of Honor” is just a redo of the studio’s 1997 hit “My Best Friend’s Wedding,” with Mr. Dempsey playing the role originated by Julia Roberts, the character who realizes that she (now a he) is in love with her (his) engaged friend.

Such transgender gamesmanship isn’t new in Hollywood, but has reached its apotheosis in Mr. Apatow’s comedies. With his rambunctious court of jesters, this new king of comedy has brilliantly gotten around the tricky, sticky female issue by turning his slackers and dudes into, well, leading ladies. These aren’t the she-males you find in the back pages of The Village Voice, mind you. The Apatow men hit the screen anatomically intact: they’re emasculated but not castrated, as the repeated images of the flopping genitals in “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” remind you. These guys talk plenty dirty, but they’re also kinder, gentler, softer and way weepier than most of their screen brethren. They ache just like women and break like little girls, but they always, always score.


The writer is clearly proud of the "she-male" joke too cuz lesse...

The Apatow she-male isn’t bad, but give me the real deal any day.


And it's great she used to write for the Village Voice but... UGH.

These aren’t the she-males you find in the back pages of The Village Voice, mind you.

Yeah that would be horrible wouldn't it? >.>;; We dun want THOSE "she-males". Hahahaha, I used the word she-male, let's laugh like crazy!

Also, now I'm curious if she would consider transwomen "the real deal" or not. >.>;;

And what's with the gender essentialism? o_O;;

Guys who are emotional are just like women! They're transgendered! They're "she-males"! But not like.. the bad she-males that are like.. those freaky freaky trannies or nething...

"ache just like women"? "break like little girls"? Awesome awesome awesome. Cuz we all know "aching" is a female thing and little girls are all fragile and stuff... *headdesk* If they're male identified, they ache like MEN! >:O They're the ones aching right!? >:O

And if men have various traits stereotypically assigned to women, they're just like women! So much so that they should be labelled with a derogatory term cisppl use to demean and exoticize transwomen! Pulitzer Prize here I come!

And being a woman is all about being emotional and achy and fragile and stuff! That's what it means to be a woman! *headdesk x 100000000*

ARGH. How did this make it past the editors!? Aren't editors supposed to like.. oh I dunno... EDIT or something!? >:OOOO

Reading it over, I'm sure she meant to write about how odd it was to her that the men in these films are fitting character roles usually assigned to women (emotional, full frontal nudity, etc), but that was NOT the way to write it. >:O

However you slice it, it's bad writing. >:|

And gender essentialism pisses me off. It's what drives the asshats like Blanchard and Zucker, and now they're talking about putting something like it in the DSM-V and I'm rly sick of how our society buys into this "girls like this, boys like that, girls feel this, boys feel that" evopsych crap... it's funny she talks about transppl (however ignorantly) in her piece, when this gender essentialism rly affects us, in that many psychs feel that transwomen need to wear dresses, feel various emotions and fit some "ideal" idea of what being female should mean in order to fit the psych's definition of what it means to be trans and get hormones, and the same but reverse with transmen. :( And it's the basis for Zucker's abuse of children and the idea that you can change somebody's gender identity by controlling the toys they play with, the colours they like, etc etc :(

And of course, tranny jokes = insta lulz! *sighs*

*growls at the NYT*

Thursday, May 08, 2008

Zucker's handiwork on display

This is heart-breaking D:

My heart weeps for the child in the first story and what Zucker is doing to zir (after much debate, I've decided to use neutral pronouns for zir. I want to use female ones, b/c of what zie said about dreaming of zirself as a girl and getting defensive when asked if about zir gender, but the article is annoyingly unclear b/c it is all about Zucker and zir parents defining zir identity and clouding everything about zir :( ). ;-;

I just... I dunno where to begin about what bothers me about this story! >:O

Ok.. let's start with the news source.

At least it does offer another view to Zucker and show that one child is happier than the other, but they still kinda keep it as "well these are two different approaches" and Zucker is after all preaching that in the FUTURE the happy child will be miserable and the miserable child will be well adjusted. :\ Plus framing it that the first child is making "improvements" and slowly being "cured". And Zucker basically gets a nice little ad for ppl worried about their child and hoping for a "cure". :( I mean this is what I hate that he's still considered a legitimate expert, that newspapers will still give him and his views lots of play and NOT treat him like the dinosaur that he is. >:| And I can see a lot of ppl who are ignorant of trans issues reading this to actually buy into the crap he says b/c it fits so well with how they alrdy see the world :(

But what rly annoys me about the reporting here: pronoun usage (ETA: They've since editted the article to fix this problem thankfully). Fine, in the first case, since they apparently are trying to be "neutral" and respect Zucker and the child's parents opinions, they use male pronouns (even tho it hurts me to read them). In the second they still use male pronouns! In fact they EDIT WHAT THE PARENTS SAID IN ORDER TO FORCE IN MALE PRONOUNS!!!!!!



And then also using male pronouns when summing up what Dr. Ehrensaft says! >:O I mean it's reporting like this that continues to confuse the public it seeks to educate! :(

And then the stuff with the first child :(

So, to treat Bradley, Zucker explained to Carol that she and her husband would have to radically change their parenting. Bradley would no longer be allowed to spend time with girls. He would no longer be allowed to play with girlish toys or pretend that he was a female character. Zucker said that all of these activities were dangerous to a kid with gender identity disorder. He explained that unless Carol and her husband helped the child to change his behavior, as Bradley grew older, he likely would be rejected by both peer groups. Boys would find his feminine interests unappealing. Girls would want more boyish boys. Bradley would be an outcast.

I feel SO AWFUL just READING THAT! And Zucker's heteronormative view of the world is pretty damn clear here. And his idea that it's important for zir to fit in more than be HAPPY WITH ZIRSELF!!!!

As his pile of toys dwindled, Carol realized Bradley was hoarding. She would find female action figures stashed between couch pillows. Rainbow unicorns were hidden in the back of Bradley's closet. Bradley seemed at a loss, she said. They gave him male toys, but he chose not to play at all.

"He turned to coloring and drawing, and he just simply wouldn't play with anything. And he would color and draw for hours and hours and hours. And that would be all he did in a day," Carol says. "I think he was really lost. ... The whole way that he knew and understood how to play was just sort of, you know, removed from his house."

His drawings, however, also proved problematic. Bradley would populate his pictures with the toys and interests he no longer had access to — princesses with long flowing hair, fairies in elaborate dresses, rainbows of pink and purple and pale yellow. So, under Zucker's direction, Carol and her husband sought to change this as well.

"We would ask him, 'Can you draw a boy for us? Can you draw a boy in that picture?' ... And then he didn't really want us to see his drawings or watch him drawing because we would always say 'Can you draw a boy?'" Carol says. "And then finally after, I don't know, a month or two, he just said, 'Momma, I don't know how. ... I don't know how to draw a boy.'"

Carol says she finally sat down and showed him. From then on, Bradley drew boys as directed. Male figures with anemic caps of hair on their heads filled the pages of his sketchbook.

The anger and anguish I'm feeling right now is just... *shakes fists*

This is not healthy. Even if zie is not transgendered, even if ze's just a boy who likes "girl" things it's NOT HEALTHY to deprive a child of what they enjoy! >:O

This is not treatment, it's attempted brainwashing of a child >:O And that they FORCE zir to draw what THEY want, to see zirself as what THEY want, to play with the toys THEY want, and ze's clearly rebelling and it's ironic that in fact I bet none of this was rly that important to zir until ppl started saying "NO YOU CANNOT LIKE WHAT YOU LIKE" >:O

And it SHOULDN'T BE A BIG DEAL!!! Children should be able to play and have fun and grow up and they should not be subjected to stuff like this! I mean why not go back to beating and forcing left handed children to use their right hand while we're at it!? >:O

Zucker has come to believe that taking the view that kids are born transgender ultimately produces more transgender people.

"By declaring the child as transgendered at, say, age 3 or age 4 or age 6, and then saying in a sense, 'Go with the flow,' ... that will impact, I believe, on how the kid's gender identity differentiates," he says.

In other words, allowing a child like Jonah to transition in kindergarten will essentially track him into becoming a transgender adult.

Oh noez! Why is being trans a horrible fate that must be avoided at all costs!? B/c HE finds it weird and therefore we must be 'fixed'!? >:O His whole argument fails b/c it rests on the idea that there's something WRONG with being transgendered in the FIRST PLACE! >:O

I feel so awful about what they are doing to zir b/c it's what I did to myself. I hid everything about myself b/c it was wrong, it was weird, b/c my family kept telling me how I had to be a man, and how after my dad died I was the "man of the house", b/c everybody kept beating me up at school, b/c the counsellors and my mom kept telling me to stop crying and suck it up, to stop acting some way or talking some way b/c I'm just bringing the beatings on myself, b/c it became a matter of survival and I was so fucking miserable neways and nobody listened to me and...

I learned how to pretend... how to act and basically kill myself off... I was miserable but at least everybody else seemed to be okay with me... I liked things I was "supposed" to like... it didn't matter what *I* wanted nemore, I was building a persona... I became obsessed with my "shields", building them up... keeping an eye on how I walked, and moved, and talked and what I said.. I CONSTANTLY monitored what I said :( And nothing ever seemed enuf b/c I always felt like ppl could see right thru me, that they KNEW and I was gonna get hurt again... that ppl would yell at me for being a failure again and weak... I learned not to cry, not to show ANY emotion... to kill off everything that I wanted, felt, etc... it was like I was pilotting a mech... it wasn't living... I talked with a lot of smileys and I started editting them out of my IMs and became COMPLETELY obsessive over everything I wrote on IM and stuff b/c I was so scared and ashamed and I literally spent EVERY SECOND training myself b/c all I could think about was the beatings and what my family expected of me and what a failure and a loser and everything I was.. I forced myself to act a whole different person, to never be me again... and... and...

I would go to bed praying to God to either kill me or have me wake up as a girl... and it got worse and worse.. and I eventually buried it and literally made myself never think about it... I felt like I was in a black hole... I was miserable and depressed and angry all the time... I tried to kill myself twice..

It was hell.

That's the short version b/c I can't express just how horrible it was for me... and it's rly hard for me to think about... and I'm only speaking for me b/c every transperson's experience is different. :) Not everybody was necessarily as dysphoric as me, or suicidal (some psychs feel that all transppl need to be "I hated my life as a boy/girl, I need to transition or die" and that's just not true >:| )

But I just... all I can see is that Zucker is TRYING TO FORCE PPL TO GROW UP LIKE THAT.. HATING who they are! Denying every feeling and desire they have b/c they're told it's wrong and bad and socially unacceptable! To be miserable (as zie alrdy is) just b/c he has stupid theories like:

But that isn't how Zucker sees it. Zucker says the homosexuality metaphor is wrong. He proposes another metaphor: racial identity disorder.

"Suppose you were a clinician and a 4-year-old black kid came into your office and said he wanted to be white. Would you go with that? ... I don't think we would," Zucker says.

Yus. ANALOGY FAIL! That is just SO STUPID it's unquantifiable! >:O And by the by, I basically did Zucker's stupid thing on myself for all those years and guess what, IT DIDN'T WORK! >:O

They would assume his mistaken beliefs were the product of a dysfunctional environment — a dysfunctional family or a dysfunctional cultural environment that led him or her to engage in this wrongheaded and dangerous fantasy. This is how Zucker sees gender-disordered kids. He sees these behaviors primarily as a product of dysfunction.

That's the same f-ing attitude I faced with psychiatrists cuz I had an abusive father so y'know, THAT'S why... >:O

And it's just... I mean... the parents grew up in a society that says that boys wear blue and girls wear pink.. boys play with these toys, girls play with these toys... and it tells them that there's something wrong with their child, and then they go see a doctor for help and the doctor tells them "YES THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG" and goes on to basically advocating abusing the poor child and trying to force her to live an identity that's NOT ZIRS! >:O

And also blaming ZIR for the bullying zie faced! That it's ZIR fault and ZIE has to change and it's not our cisnormative culture that should change! >:O

I mean.. THIS IS THE POWER THAT THESE "EXPERTS" HAVE! And as the article points out, b/c he's such a big name and b/c ppl keep giving him credibility and doing stuff like MAKING HIM CHAIR of the gender identity workgroup for the DSM, ppl will KEEP bringing their children to him!

"It's really hard for him. He'll disappear and close a door, and we'll find him playing with dolls and Polly Pockets and ... the stuff that he's drawn to," she says.

In particular, there is one typically girl thing — now banned — that her son absolutely cannot resist.

"He really struggles with the color pink. He really struggles with the color pink. He can't even really look at pink," Carol says. "He's like an addict. He's like, 'Mommy, don't take me there! Close my eyes! Cover my eyes! I can't see that stuff; it's all pink!' "

Still, Carol says, Bradley has made some progress. Today, he is able to play with boys. He has a few male friends, and has said that he now enjoys boy things. And there are other signs of change.

"I mean, he tells us now that he doesn't dream anymore that he's a girl. So, we're happy with that. He's still a bit defensive if we ask him, 'Do you want to be a girl?' He's like 'No, NO! I'm happy being a boy. ...' He gives us that sort of stock answer. ... I still think we're at the stage where he feels he's leading a double life," she says. "... I'm still quite certain that he is with the girls all the time at school, and so he knows to behave one way at school, and then when he comes home, there's a different set of expectations."

I rly do feel so awful for zir. :( My heart breaks. I know what that "double life" feels like and trying to bury the person you are :(

Despite these difficulties, Zucker clearly feels it's important to at least attempt change. He points out that the burden of living as the opposite gender is great, and should not be casually embraced.

"We're not talking about minor medical treatments. ... You're talking about lifelong hormonal treatment; you're talking about serious and substantive surgery," he says.

We're talking about a chance at happiness. At least in my case.

We're talking about me being able to be happy for the first time in almost 20 years. :) Taking a few pills a day? There are lots of ppl who have to take a few pills (or more) a day. It's NOT a big deal. Being happy, being ME finally after a decade and a half of pretending... THAT is a big deal.

Also surgery is optional, jackass.

The other story makes me feel rly happy tho! :D Such great parents and psychiatrist! :D

Awww... whenever I read stories of ppl who transition young, I feel so happy for them (and also jealous XD) and like YAY!

And I'm SO glad that the article talks about the other experience too and gives some time to the other psych also who sounds so great and :D

But the fact that Zucker is still out there, that he has a LOT more credibility than the progressive trans-positive psychs and stuff is rly upsetting. :(

I feel so bad for all the children being lined up to see him! D: Trans or not, what he advocates is NOT HEALTHY!

Sry about that :( I dun mean to just blog about trans stuff constantly now :( It's just that I read this article and I HAD to rant about it >:O

And in case nebody's wondering, how I eventually came out to myself after all the denial and burying is thru City of Heroes. xD I actually got into City of Heroes b/c I had gotten rly into superhero comics at the time b/c of the Superman/Batman Supergirl arc and I was like "Yay they brought Supergirl back!" And that got me into comics and then my friend (who I had gotten into comics shortly after) got me into City of Heroes.

Neways like in every game I've ever played, I made a male char to start, ignored him, made a whole bunch of female chars and played them xD And I was playing Starlight Angel and made a LOT of friends, and everybody thought I was a girl, and I started getting comfortable with letting go and talking the way I wanted and I didn't pretend to be somebody else, I was honest about details of my rl, just not my gender... I was ME, but a girl (i.e. me) and happy and positive instead of miserable and angry. I was a superheroic girl! And one day I was playing and having fun and everything and I looked in a mirror I have on my desk for putting in contacts and I saw my face and something in me snapped. I wanted to grab the mirror and HURL IT AT THE WALL. >:O And the first thought I had was "THAT IS NOT ME".

And I started to wonder why I thought that... and then the thought wouldn't go away... and.. well...

the rest is another story! :D But maybe that's why superhero comics will always have a special place in my heart. :] I know, I know, my coming out to myself story sounds so silly cuz it's related to comics and video games ;-;


Hmm.. that was long :( I didn't mean to talk about my past :( It came out b/c what I was reading about what the poor child was going thru made me think of what I put myself thru. :(

And what Zucker and those like him are doing to children is wrong. Whether they're actually transgendered or not, it's wrong. And it's abusive. >:O

And now for the anti-creepy! :D

Hehehehe :D

There were SO MANY GOOD LINES there! xDDD

And the ending is <3 :D

*backs away slowly* >.>;;;

I'm so creeped out o_o

"They belong to me 100%".

Um... ok... ew...

That is like the creepiest sentence evar.

Maybe it's better you stick to dolls if your idea of a healthy relationship is that you OWN your partner "100%". >.>

"A human girl can cheat on you or betray you sometimes, but these dolls never do those things."

Those stuck up horrible real live women and their independent brains and personalities! >:O

It's like the ultimate SSJ4 form of the "nice guy". xD

I mean.. as long as he's not hurting nebody and this makes him happy but... omg...

Still creepy... O_O;;;

Time travel and dancing! :D Best combo evar xD

A fun game involving temporal mechanics! xD Including paradoxes o_o

Also glarfed from Ororo:

THIS IS SO CUUUTTE!!! xDDD Hehehehehe... they all look so happy and stuff :D And look and them dance! :D I wish I had neat hair like the first girl tho D:

Hehehehehehehehe :D Awwwwww :3

I feel so bad for the white haired girl tho! D: She's having trouble following the arm actions D:

Wednesday, May 07, 2008


Okay.. this is rly hard for me to write just cuz I'm crying and rly upset about this right now and... *SCREAMS*

THIS IS JUST SO F-ING AWFUL!!!! (warning: might be very triggering)



It's rly hard for me to deal with b/c it's intensely triggering to me...


She defends herself from a sexual assault and is RESTRAINED for it (b/c y'know crazy women and all *screams*) and then SEXUALLY ASSAULTED AGAIN!? While everybody cheers and she has to fight THEM off too to get away!?

And then when she shows amazing strength and courage by writing about it... she gets attacked by MORONS who not only accuse her of lying but attack her appearance and clothing b/c y'know, sexual assault is about attraction. And how it's suspicious that she waited so long to write about it (CUZ Y'KNOW IT'S SO EASY) and UGHHHHHH!!!!
And the rest of the comments... I can't rly think about them right now...


Sry... I dun think I can write more... I'm just so angry about this and I wanted to let ppl know about it...

I need to go now... :(

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Never ask an Ami to help you with your resume xD

[09:55] Matt: hrm what are my strengths, ami
[09:57] Ami Angelwings: enhanced strength, enhanced speed, flight, limited invulnerability, limited telepathy

Repeat after me: Transphobia is not the fault of transppl >:O

This is a follow-up to my previous post about Blanchard and Zucker being part of the gender identity workgroup for the DSM-V (you should prolly read that first)


So my friend has been reading the transcripts of the preliminary conferences on gender identity for the DSM-V and showed me this exchange between Dr. Katherine Wilson (who is a transwoman) and Dr. Fink (former head of the APA, yes that's rly his name, it's very fitting):

Dr. Wilson:
And I would also like to, excuse me, I would like to come back to the issue of GID stigma that Dr. Fink raised. Speaking as a TS woman who has faced this stigma all of my life; in truth we lose our homes, we lose our jobs, we lose our children, we even lose visitation to our children on the presumption that we are not legitimate in our inner experienced identities and that presumption is permanent and that is the big problem with labeling our gender identities as disordered rather than referencing the distress.

Dr. Fink:
Can I ask you a question? (Dr. Wilson: Certainly) I didn't know until you told me that you were a TS woman. There was no way I could know. You're a woman, an attractive woman, it never occurred to me that you were a TS [woman]. So, I don't understand how people find this out. Well, why let people know it? Now, if it's an important part of your psychology to let everybody know so that they will stigmatize you, that's a whole other story. But once you have had the corrective surgery and you're in your life, seems to me that that's your life.


I mean just... ARGH

I'm tired of the onus being on us to avoid transphobia! I mean "Now, if it's an important part of your psychology to let everybody know so that they will stigmatize you, that's a whole other story."

WHAT? Like it's OUR fault if ppl know and they stigmatize us!? And the only reason we'd tell ppl is SO they'd stigmatize us!? The problem is that ppl STIGMATIZE US! The problem is that there IS a stigma in society. And y'know what doesn't help the STIGMA? Stuff like... oh I dunno... saying we're mentally disordered and keeping GID in the DSM-V!?


And of course, well if transppl dun pass, it's our f-ing fault neways! If we just put more effort into passing and keep quiet, go deep stealth and all fit the nice happy gender binary things would be FINE! If only we'd stop complaining about the challenges we face and pretend to be normal happy cis ppl, and just hide who we are and our past and our experiences and EVERYTHING about who we are deep down inside and just STFU. I mean what's being trans except looking funny neways? Just try to look and dress and act and sound normal and you'll be FINE.

And ppl who dun pass, dun care to pass, dun get surgery (b/c as usual surgery is like the end all and be all of being trans *sighs*), who dun fit a heteronormative presentation, or who are genderqueer, etc well it's YOUR fault if you LET ppl know, SO that they can stigmatize you! And that just shows you have psychological issues!

Cuz it's OUR job to hide from the stigma! >:O Cuz y'know, we MAKE ppl stigmatize us by doing something wrong, by maybe sounding wrong (my voice isn't the best for ex), looking funny, dressing funny, not subscribing to a rigid gender binary, being too tall, being too short, etc etc

We bring it on OURSELVES! >:O Argh!

And this is the type of crap we have to face! These are the ppl who STUDY us, who TREAT us, who are supposedly EXPERTS on us and whose opinions are valued by the psychiatric community, and they are contributing to this very stigma that they ACKNOWLEDGE but refuse to do ANYTHING ABOUT! I mean this guy has had many trans patients and stuff, and he doesn't GET IT AT ALL! He blames transphobia on transppl, acts like we ALL WANT TO and MUST pass, and that we must be screwed in the head otherwise!

He dismisses the concerns of a REAL LIVE transwoman thinking that placating her with "you pass, you're pretty" will be enuf, and tells US about what WE face, and how it's not a big deal, and says "well you can avoid it by going deep stealth!"

And like, I pass often. But not 100%. :\ And I know I'm lucky, b/c I can pass and I do want to pass, b/c how I want to present happens to fit nicely with what's cisnormative. :\ But I've also faced a lot of harrassment from ppl who have "clocked" me. I've had a mall security officer stop me, accuse me of stealing (cuz I was shopping for women's clothes which is CLEARLY suspicious) and humiliate me in front of all the shoppers by pressuring me, threatening me and forcing me to use my voice to out me publicly and I got out of there to the bus stop as fast as I could before nebody could react. :(

I had a couple guys yell at me recently that my "cock is showing" and walk RIGHT AT me, forcing me to run into the nearest building b/c I dunno what would have happened if I didn't.

And that's just some of the experiences I've dealt with and so many other transppl face stuff like that and so much worse! >.<;; And at least I'm lucky that I do pass most of the time now (except my voice). :\ But... even when you pass, the threat is still there. The fear is always at the back of my mind. And it's supposed to be MY fault that I face stuff like this? That I'm just not passing well enuf? Well then. I see... I clearly WANT ppl to stigmatize me, b/c it's not the stigma that's the problem it's ME!

And CLEARLY I want to have to hide myself. CLEARLY I want to have to always worry if a job I take is trans friendly in case ppl found out, if ppl I meet would be trans friendly if they knew. I want to have to hide who I am and my experiences lest ppl find out! Cuz y'know, I WANT TO HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT ALL THIS.

Yus, cuz the problem isn't that our society is transphobic. Or that the medical community continues to give credence to that transphobia by putting somebody like Zucker as the chair of the gender identity workshop for the DSM-V! Or by promoting the idea that we're just mentally disturbed individuals. Yus, cuz that's not the problem. It's OUR fault. It's OUR fault for not hiding better (even tho many of us have been hiding all our lives, pretending to be somebody we're not). It's our fault if we choose to "out" ourselves or identify as transppl! Cuz there's no problem! If we didn't act, look, sound or dress like freaks, then we wouldn't be treated like one, discriminated against, beaten up, etc! FAIR RIGHT!? >:O

And who cares what WE want? Or what changes WE want to do to OUR bodies. Whether WE want to have surgery or not! Who cares about how WE want to identify? Or if WE consider our experiences as transppl valuable and important to our identity that we don't want to hide that part of our identity? That to some of us it's not as easily dismissed as Dr. Fink seems to think. That BAM! surgery! Well now you can put your trans identity and experiences behind you forever and things will be great! Except what about ppl who don't want to do that!? What about ppl who, like Dr. Wilson, consider it part of who they are, and can't or dun want to keep their transgendered identity quiet? Then they have PSYCHOLOGICAL PROBLEMS. Cuz well EVERYBODY WANTS TO BE "NORMAL" RIGHT?

There are transppl who choose to go deep stealth, who dun consider themselves or identify as transsexuals at all, who do pass, who want to pass (like me! :D), etc. And that's their choice and I understand that it's how they feel and who they are. :) But it should be a CHOICE! It should not be EXPECTED of or PUSHED on nebody. We should not have to hide what we may consider a big part of ourselves!

And this is coming from an EXPERT and a former head of the APA! >:O And he's not alone. I mean who's heading the workshop on Gender Identity? A guy who thinks that transwomen must be FIXED and that we're just gay men! Who else is part of it? A guy who thinks that transwomen are either rly rly effeminate gay men who wants to get a straight man, or rly rly horny straight men who wants to possess a female body so he can dress it up exoticize it! >:O THESE are the ppl who are considered the "experts" on transsexuals! Ppl who dun even RECOGNIZE our gender identity! (and of course nobody cares about transmen :( )


No wonder there's a stigma.

No wonder so many ppl dun respect our gender identity and think we're freaks.

No wonder I have to deal with all the idiots who think I'm "really" a guy and use the wrong pronouns, sometimes on purpose to show me that THEY'RE NOT FOOLED. Or the ppl pointing and staring, grabbing their friends and going "OMG IS THAT A DUDE?". Or the "sirs" instead of "ma'ams" when they hear my voice or spot SOMETHING about me that's "off". -_- And on and on and ON... and just... having your identity invalidated like that in just regular daily life wears you down. ;-;

I mean... they tell us "oh just go stealth and stop complaining!", and then they push the idea to EVERYBODY ELSE that we're just rly our birth sex and mentally disordered. Is it rly a wonder then, that so many ppl think we're just frauds that they have to "spot" and not be "fooled" by!? :\

These "experts", with their heteronormative cissexist theories that invalidate our identity and our gender, fuel a lot of this stigma and transphobia that we face and then they BLAME US for causing it!!!

I am JUST so tired of ppl saying that if we just passed (cuz y'know it's SOOO easy for everybody even if they wanted it) and shut up and looked and acted like good little heteronormative ppl and stuff, things would be FINE. That the problem isn't transphobia or the stigma of being transgendered in this society. That the solution isn't to FIGHT that transphobia and that stigma and the ignorance that surrounds trans issues, but to fight US. To force US into little boxes, and tell us we HAVE to hide and we HAVE to pass and we HAVE to get surgery, or well, then we choose to be stigmatized and discriminated against and must have psychological problems!

I mean. I lost all of my extended family and all of my rl friends when I came out. All of them. Is this MY fault too? Could I have avoided their transphobia somehow? I mean it's ridiculous. What was the problem there? ME? Or the transphobic attitudes that are sadly prevalent in our society that they absorbed? As Dr. Wilson said in her fantastic response, ppl who knew her in a different context, before she "passed" did react differently to her and were transphobic, b/c there is a lot of transphobia in our society, and it has to be challenged b/c avoiding it is not a solution.

It's. Not. On. Us.


Transphobia is not the fault of transppl.

And the onus should not be on us to "pass" as cisppl just to be treated the way cisppl take for granted. We should not have to fear losing our jobs, our children or our LIVES b/c ppl might find out *gasp* WHO WE ARE!

Nobody should. >:|

And the ppl who CAN make a real difference, the ppl whose opinions are respected by the scientific community, who CAN eliminate one GIANT stigma simply by removing GID from the DSM-V, are instead the ppl who are supporting that same stigma, and in many ways fuelling the transphobic ideas in our society, by not respecting our identity, by pushing a heteronormative idea of gender, by labelling us as mentally disordered, by creating clinics to "cure" us as if we are diseased!

They're the ones who bear at least some of the responsiblity for the transphobia and the stigmatization that transppl face in our lives!

NOT US. >:|

Yay sportsmanship! :]

Awww this is such a great story :]

It makes me all happy and stuff :)

Monday, May 05, 2008

Oh good.

Oh good

5-03-08: American Psychiatric Association Press Release (of 5-01-08): "APA Names DSM-V Work Group Members - Experts to Revise Manual for Diagnosis of Mental Disorders". Ken Zucker, who heads a reparatist clinic for gender-variant youth in Toronto, was named as Chair of the Sexual and Gender Identity Disorders Work Group for DSM Revision. Ray Blanchard, widely known for pronouncing that transitioned women are "men without penises", was appointed as a member of that Work Group.

*head desk*

Well looks like nothing's going to change in the DSM, GID will still be in it and therefore transsexuality is still gonna be considered a mental disorder (actually a friend told me that it looks like things are possibly going backwards with the possible addition of something that looks a lot like gender essentialism) D: *sighs*

I hate that those 2 idiots are still considered "experts" and are put in charge of stuff like this and ppl still listen to them and ARGHHHHHHHH >:O I mean according to Blanchard I'm either an effeminate homosexual male that's just so damn gay I have to transition, or a heterosexual male who likes women so much and is just so damn horny I want to be one so I can sit in the mirror and masturbate all day or something! >:O

And Zucker is just.. UGH :( Also again thinking that transgirls are ultimately gay boys (cuz we all know gender id and sexuality are the SAME THING) and ARGH. He and Blanchard are both in my city too. ;-; My endo actually consulted with him and I had to have a psych evaluation with a colleague of his and it was.. an unpleasent experience. :\ I ended up going around the lot of them and getting HRT from a clinic that is rly good with transppl (something I'm so glad I did :]). >:|

Bonus Blanchard quote (via my friend):
"This is not waving a magic wand and a man becomes a woman and vice versa, it's something that has to be taken very seriously. A man without a penis has certain disadvantages in this world, and this is in reality what you're creating."

- Ray Blanchard, c. 2004

And he's not talking about pre/non-op FtMs when he says "man without a penis" (since after all, FtMs dun exist, DUH). *sighs* And of course ALL MtFs MUST get surgery! How can ppl honestly take seriously an "expert" who calls transwomen "men" and acting like we're some creature they're "creating"? >:O

I'm a girl! Is that SO HARD to respect!? >:O

*flails and throws things angrily* >:|

Sunday, May 04, 2008

oops >.>

Apparently Facebook has been hiding friends requests from me! D: So if I hadn't accepted your friends request for some reason, that's why! xD I have now! :D

Sry about that XD

<3 Ami

Hehehehehehehehe XD <3

Trish showed me this :D

Saturday, May 03, 2008

Doeo! :D

This is such an amazingly cute game


It's sorta in the vein of Katamari Damacy with different fun crazy music for each stage and a simple concept and set in a real world sorta setting that's also kinda weird :D

I find it rly relaxing and fun :D