Chris Benoit is dead :(
But he killed his wife and son and committed suicide! >:|
I used to be a huge wrestling rat and I was a big fan of him too. :( But I also wun let that cloud the facts. :\
I'm just tired of hearing and reading all these comments from ppl DEFENDING him! Like.. wtf... esp the ppl blaming his wife, or some unknown person who framed him, or the police.
CLEARLY a celebrity cannot do horrible things!
Like.. ppl who say he's a wonderful person and would never do this. Did you know him?
*smighs* It's just... a horrible thing happened... and instead of mourning his family, ppl seem intent on saying it has to be their fault! Or that his wife framed him.
Yus, she tied herself to the bed and with her THIRD ARM strangled herself to death! >.>;;
*growls*
Blaming the victim just annoys me so much :(
Or that Benoit seems blameless in many fans eyes b/c well.. he's such a wonderful person!
I bet they wouldn't be so generous to just any other person who killed their family. :(
Even if it was some magical 3 day "roid rage", he's still responsible. :\ If you drink and drive and kill somebody, you're still responsible, even tho you weren't in full control of your faculties. :(
Even more silly is the ppl who claim it's an elaborate police set up, or that somebody broke in, overpowered two musclebound wrestlers and hung Chris Benoit WITHOUT USING WEAPONS or leaving a trace. >.>;;; Yub yub... ppl have been watching too much Law and Order SVU XD
*sighs* :( It's sad... :\ I just hate that ppl are blaming the victims and some ppl are saying she deserved it b/c clearly she was nagging him or something. And I hate when ppl say a woman deserved domestic abuse or worse. :(
Antonia Zerbisias also wrote a piece about this too and domestic violence and spousal homicides in general. :(
*sighs* :\
Edit: I want to clear up that it's not that I think Benoit is a horrible person or nething. :\ I dunno him, only what he's done. But I dun think he's blameless and a saint like some ppl. :( I'm mostly angry that ppl are blaming the victims just to absolve him of responsibility, and that's wrong. >:|
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Let's blame the victim! >:|
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9 comments:
I think it's that when a star has a nice guy rep, as apparently Benoit did, people strive to find a reason outside the person for a horrific crime. Example, I admit, if Seth Green (who has a real nice guy rep, and comes across as a decent person in every interview I have watched or read or listened to) were suddenly accused of rape or murder. I would not want to believe it. On the other hand, with overwhelming evidents you have to suck it up and admit that the person was not that good.
I don't think this is entirely limited celebrities though. Anytime someone snaps and kills family, we want to come up with some logic that absolves someone. More than one woman has killed her own children and had a defense of PostPartum Depression. The uncle of Cutts is blaming the young woman he may have killed. I think human nature wants to believe that humans are not naturally capable of such horror. That it has to be a mental imbalance, drugs,etc. It was not "the real person" that committed the file act, it was circumstances outside them.
I think thom is on the money with people wanting to believe the person's reputation. I watched the tribute show Monday night, and see all these people talking about what a great family guy Chris was (of course, it was a tribute, what are they going to say, he was an abusive jerk?), then I hear he probably killed his wife and son, and think "That can't be right."
The thing I'm wondering is, is there any place for compassion for Chris? I feel for Nancy and Daniel, who didn't deserve a fate like that, and the two kids Benoit apparently has from another relationship (even if they weren't close to him, and so won't really miss him, people who know he's their dad are going to treat them differently now), and the friends of everyone involved (who lose people important to them, and in a way that will have them wondering why for a long time).
But does Benoit merit any? Do I look at him and dismiss him as murdering scum, or crazy, as someone to be looked at in contempt, or do I think that perhaps he was damaged in some way that caused this to happen beyond his control, and that allows a little room for us to feel badly for someone who wasn't in control?
That's the primary thing I'm trying to figure out, because part of me does want to give him a little benefit of the doubt and think that somehow he wasn't in control of his actions, and I can feel bad for him not being able to stop himself, but the other part says he killed his family, and I shouldn't feel bad for someone who does that.
I think there's a big difference between feeling compassion for Chris and blaming his family (which is ridiculous). It's a sad, horrible thing all around.
Thom nailed it: we don't want to believe that a good or normal person can do this kind of thing, so we look for excuses. In WW2 scholarship there are lots of studies that try to figure out how "ordinary" people went along with the Holocaust. In other areas of history, there are scholars who want to deny that human sacrifice ever happened, etc. We don't want to believe that we are capable of such things.
Of course there is a form of compassion for Benoit. Having compassion doesn't mean absolving from all guilt.
I agree with Ami that this wasn't roid rage. It lasted too long, and involved too much premeditation. It could have been a severe hallucination or some other "break with reality" caused by long-term use of steroids, or powerful painkillers, etc.
Also, at some point we--and the WWE especially--need to look at this *without* emotion and assess what exactly happened, what contributed to it, and how it can be avoided from now on.
real sick thing is he shot his kid up with roids as he was undersized. and also suffering from something called fragile x syndrone which is a condition that causes mild retardation. this happens predominately to males and really fucks them up big time. now the domestic violence could deffinitely be true..i mean come on now. but the roid rage..not so much. i've seen my fare share of roid rage. (not me personally as i never touched the stuff) but friends of mine did. a burst of roid rage is a somewhat quick thing psychologicly. he took time to kill his wife..binding her hands and feet. then strangulation. deffinitely a premeditated long running thing instead of a burst of rage. one thing roids could have played a part in is deterioration of the brain tissues causing mental illness over a long period of time.
i've been studying this shit for years. i being a child of abuse and had roided up assholes in my life. i wanted to understand how shit happens and ways to avoid it...thus breaking the cycle of abuse in families. a noble cause some say. there's a whole crazy long explaination that really you don't need me to spout here on your blog.
i really think the WWE had better rethink how it works with people. the problem is these guys go out 4-5 nights a week and get injured...go to shady doctors and just medicate. the toll it takes on people physicly and mentally is enormous. is it any wonder why all these wrestlers have such tragic ends? what needs to be done is making a real commission..with the government that will ensure the wellness of the employees. real consequences for steroid use. real medical intervention with on the level doctors. also not working people so fucking much. you'd eliminate alot of the problems that way. maybe these guys can have normal lives that way. i'm speaking as a guy who used to wrestle for independents in the 90's. i'm living injured..i don't medicate like the others. i was never a roid guy. so i'mk thankful for that..i didn't have the quad tears like HHH or some such. but i did break my neck and back and numerous other things.
i'm not condoning what benoit did. he's an asshole and if he abused his wife (he did) he deserves nothing but the worst. but we have to look at the big picture and the WWE as a whole. i'm speaking as a child of horror..and as a former wrestler..and as a concerned human being.
Hi Thom :D I think that it is often celebrities tho. At least in terms of this sort of outpouring. :(
If it's a regular person we try to understand it and come up with reasons, but there's no this "this person was a saint, they would NEVAR do this, they were SET UP" mentality. :\ In fact if a lot of these fans had read in the paper that some random person had did these crimes they would prolly just say that person was a horrible person. :(
It IS hard to deal with tho. :( I have a hard enuf time admitting when Geoff Johns or Paul Dini has written a horrible book! So to face up to somebody you admire committing a terrible crime would be so hard! But I can't deny the facts. :\
Calvin: The tribute show happened before WWE found out the details and now they're removing it and everything about Benoit from their site. I think WWE regrets the tribute show, but I think it's better they got it out of the way when they could claim ignorance. :) A lot of these fan defences are coming from ppl who watched the tribute show and believed every word that was said about him. :\ The truth is tho everybody is nice to SOMEBODY. :| There are lots of ppl I've been mean to in my life who would prolly not believe the nice things my friends would say about me and be like "is this the same person!?" >.>
The sympathy thing is so hard! I always have a degree of sympathy for some criminals, but ppl DO choose their own actions. :\ If he had just committed suicide, I would feel bad for him, but I find it hard to excuse killing his wife and child. :(
If he hadn't killed himself, would ppl be looking to give him sympathy tho? :\ If he ran from the police and denied it (instead of showing remorse), would there be sympathy? :|
It's hard to say :( But one thing I do know, it's not right to blame the victims of something like this. :(
Rob: Yus! That's how I feel. :)
Giant: WWE has completely backed off and is siding with the police reports, prolly cuz they feel embaressed about the tribute and need to completely show that "now that we know what happened, we wun glorify a murderer".
Maddox: Yus! Maybe this finally will shake up the culture of WWE, even tho it doesn't absolve Benoit of any responsibility, it might at least have them look at their steroid culture (even Vince admits to taking it, and if he's taking it clearly it sends a msg), and also the strain they put on their workers.
*hugs* I'm sorry about your wrestling injuries tho. :( But at least you understand what they're going thru and stuffs :)
True, we are more generous to a celebrity than someone else. But in fairness, if you talk to the family of a serial killer, they often come up with excuses or talk about how nice that person was. With celebrities, people feel a familiar connection. "I know that guy!" We have read interviews, we see them on TV, buy their books...so, just like we might say, "I can't believe my friend/family member would committ such a terrible act!" we do the same for a celebrity we feel an attachment to. Bear in mind, people who don't care about wrestling are not praising Benoit. His fans and fellow wrestlers have been. People who know nothing of his reputation are saying, "Man, he must have been really messed up!"
Yeah, he was a great family guy... who murdered his family. I don't understand why the murdering of his family doesn't get factored into their overall assessment of the man and his legacy.
It seems to me, murdering your family trumps the time you gave them a pony ride or hired a clown for their birthday party.
But I also agree with Thom. When people love a celebrity and then hear something like this the initial response is disbelief in some way. I remember learning about Kirby Puckett's less than savory off the field behavior and it was of such an overwhelmingly negative quality it made me reassess my opinion of him.
With celebrities, caveat emptor. Their public faces- like most of ours- are not their private selves.
In Puckett's case, his constant off-the-record badmouthing of his charity work and his evident dislike for the kids he was ostensibly helping sorta smeared mud on this "civic minded philanthropist" public image he had.
Kind of like KILLING YOUR FAMILY puts a lie to the "wonderful father and husband" story.
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