Monday, January 22, 2007

I'm tired of hearing that I don't exist!

Gamer Girls.

Comic Book Girls.

Yah, we dun exist.

This is my rant, triggered by that post that's been going around about the women who was challenged by the guys at her comic book store to prove her "worthiness" to be a Batman fan.

I keep hearing that we dun exist. That there are no gamer girls. But what these guys mean are that there no gamer girls that fit THEIR fantasy. >:|

What they want isn't a girl who shares their interests, or knows as much about comics as them, or who plays video games. What they MEAN is that they want a girl who is

a) attractive

b) like a "normal" silly girl

c) is INTERESTED in everything they like, but has less knowledge than them

A gamer girl isn't a girl who games, it's one who will watch in awe as their boyfriend games and tell him how awesome he is and complain about how much trouble it is to get to lv10 with her blaster. XD

What they want is a girl who says "omg Batman is awesome, but I like Robin too" and then when they respond "Oh, Robin died, this is the third Robin actually" and we're supposed to go "REALLY? I didn't know that! OMG you know so much!"

They want a girl who's not gonna make them do things they dun want b/c they love everything they love, but wun hog the computer to play their video games. They'll just sit there in ever loving adoration. Just like how I hear some guys say the perfect girl is one who likes sports. Yet the girls they meet who do like sports scare them, b/c they're not the hot models you see in beer ads who giggle a lot. :|

These guys (and I'm not saying ALL guys) are self-conscious and feel that while they may not be "cool" in the traditional sense, they still are smarter and know more about comics/video games/whatever than nebody else. :\ So for a girl to show up and be their equal is scary. Esp when we're attractive. Then it's like "OMG, she can have ne guy she wants AND she wouldn't be impressed by what I say..."

I also rly dislike that most gamer/geek/whatever girls are dismissed cuz they're not supermodels. Like, I guess I'm lucky cuz I'm considered attractive? (And there's that whole Asian thing, but that's a rant for another day) But it's so annoying when guys keep complaining to me about the lack of gamer girls and how rare I am. HELLO!!! I know LOTS. LOTS!!! And it's funny that guys who spend most of their time behind a computer and not at a gym, want gamer girls to look like they spend most of their time at a gym and not at the computer. >:|

I knew a lot of geeky guys in HS, I was friends with a lot of them, and it was very bothersome how they seem to look down on girls, esp attractive ones. I guess their way of feeling that the universe is fair is to believe that attractive girls who dun want them (but they want) are stupid, vapid and not worth it. So when they come across one who isn't, it's like... what's your excuse now?

And it goes back to how some girls stay away from these interests and why ppl keep saying that there are very few girls who frequent their comic store. Cuz it feels like a boys only club sometimes! It feels like unless we're there to be the little playthings of the guys, to be their perfect cosplaying gamer girl, we aren't allowed to be there. :(

I think it is a self confidence thing tho. They feel that if they lose what makes them "special" if they're forced to relate to ppl without their shield of being smarter than them, they have nothing there that's special or attractive. :(

Or maybe I'm wrong XD But that incident does grate on me, and it does bother me whenever my guy friends complain about there being no geek girls in the universe. There ARE, just not the ones that are in your mind! >:O If you mean "how come there are no pornstar geek girls" out there, I should also ask "how come there are no pornstar geek guys" out there.

Neways... this rly was a rant XD Not something I thought a lot about before writing :|

Back to your regularly scheduled cuteness! :D


  1. Oh man...this is making me contemplate a another satire post-one about what I want in a woman (smart-but not near as smart as me. Able to play video games, but not better than me-because I suck at them).

    I've always found the cultural obsession with beauty rather frightening. On the one hand, we adore young and attractive women, on the other hand we also want to remind oursleves that pretty people are somehow really deficient as human beings.

    My sister and I were joking that the women she really can't stand are the ones who are both really attractive and really good hearted people. Because dammit, it's not fair to have looks AND personality.

    But it seems, at least in the western world, we have a real love hate thing with physical beauty. We like to be the ones to put a person on the pedestal and the ones to knock them off.

  2. Heh.
    Yeah, I actually am friends with several Gamer/comic girls who complian about stuff like this too. It's because most gamer/comic guys just don't know what to do when it comes to women. Considered geeks by society at large they have severe inferiority complexes especially when it comes to the oposite sex.
    Not that all of us have this problem. I've never minded girls knowing more about my comics than I do, and also met a lot of gamer/comic girls when I worked for the comic store back in the day. And yes, some of them were very attractive, but all of them were good peoples.

  3. I loved this! While it isn't universally true, it still is true.

    Personally I think both men and women are more comfortable having their own things to enjoy. When they're together they can enjoy each other, but they don't both need to like to game or read the same comics. I don't need or want my husband to do all of the same things I do!

    Men claim they want "hot chicks" that game and read comics but are angry because they don't exist. Well, they DO - and most men that claim to want these kind of women wouldn't know what to do with her if she walked up to him and asked him out herself.

    Sure, there are fewer women who read comics and play games than men. And sure, not all of them are hot. But from my observation, there aren't that many super-hot, well-mannered men that scrapbook either, much to MY dismay.

  4. I think Lisa brings up a real good point. You know, I've never complained about not being able to find a woman whole likes all the stuff I like, or even a lot of it. I always just ask that she *respect* it. It's no fun when someone you like looks laughs at your hobbies. Besides, it would not be hard for me to find a girl better at video games than me...I suck at them. :)

  5. As a somewhat geeky guy, I have to say i've never understood geeky guy culture.
    My geeky guy friends typically hate any girl I'm dating because they aren't geeky enough. meaning, in their eyes, we can have nothing in common. My geeky guy friends only acknowledge my geeky guy side, you see. Anything I do not involving comic books doesn't exist.
    These same geeky guy friends, not to stereotype, are the same ones I've known since middle school and have never seen actually have a [i]conversation[/i] with a girl.

    And it's not that they don't have chances. I mean, as a heterosexual male, I can say they aren't a bad looking bunch of people, and they're smart, and fairly social.

    Personally, I blame Rob Liefeld.

  6. Hi Nick! :D

    I totally understand how you feel cuz I had a lot of friends in HS like that too, and it always seems like outside of that ONE interest they have in common, there's NOTHING ELSE THERE. :O And that's ALL they talk about (in that case, video games and anime). And they'll talk about girls and judge them like they can get ne one of us they want, but they wun even talk to ne girls! >.<;;;

    And yes, I blame Rob Liefeld too! XD But he's responsible for everything! He's like the Superboy Prime punching the magic wall of life XD

  7. "Blame Rob Liefeld."

    I like that. And I can see all sorts of applications. :)

  8. Anonymous12:45 PM

    You're saying some intelligent things, but you hamstring the credibility of your arguments with the aolspeak. If it's a stylistic choice, it's the wrong one for this post; it just makes you look like a stupid, giggling twit when you're trying to be taken seriously.

  9. I think one of the main problems is when games/comics/cards/whater stops being a hobby, and becomes a lifestyle. Everything has to have some connection to it.

    Not that I go out of my way to HIDE my geek side- if someone sees a longbox in my living room, and asks 'what's that?', i've got no problem telling them.

    As for Rob Liefeld, I find you can blame him for just about ANYTHING. Flat tire? DAMN YOU, LIEFELD! If I ever start blogging again, you can bet on a 'unified theory of liefeld' to show up.

  10. What they MEAN is that they want a girl who is
    c) is INTERESTED in everything they like, but has less knowledge than them

    Disagree. You imply that there are "gamer girls" for every "gamer guy," but that they are being rejected because they are more knowledgeable about games. Untrue.

    Of the women I know, very very few have more than a passing interest in gaming. While I know that hardcore gaming girls are out there, I know zero of them. I do not include that in the qualities I look for because its rarity is limiting. I do not know any male who has ever rejected a girl because she knew more about games than he did.

    You may have a point that men want attractive gamer girls, but that's not particularly shocking is it? Men want women who are attractive (along with a host of other characteristics). Should the fact that she has an XBOX be enough?

    There are good reasons to seek a geeky mate. While couples do well when they have some different interests, dating a fellow geek might 1) create the bonding from mutual experiences, 2) prevent feelings of alienation and 3) allow for guiltless time expenditure (Most men know that a few too many hours of Halo can get one into trouble).

  11. I love everything you're saying here...I just wish you'd drop the chat-speak. Chat lingo works for chat, but when you're writing well-thought entries where punctuation is actually used, the abbreviations look so out of place and come off sounding like a makes it more difficult for people to take you seriously (and makes a lot of us cringe)...

  12. Anonymous12:29 AM

    Lovely post, that I completely randomly stumbled across, and I agree fully, with one addition. It's not just gamer or comic girls that get challenged by geek culture (although they certainly get the worst of it), it's anyone who doesn't fit their inclusive self-stereotyping of wht it takes to 'deserve' the status. I'm male, have been gaming for a long time, own every system out, also happen to collect comics obsessively, and have even written two. Anyone who knows me would instantly categorize me as a gaming and comic geek. However, I don't look like what a comic fan or a gamer is apparently supposed to look like. I know what a frech cuff is, I like, and wear, Prada and Dior, and, despite loving the games, nothing on this earth could make me wear a Halo t-shirt. I'm also straight, and reasonably good looking (mostly because I know how to dress myself. Try having a conversation with a comic book/gaming store clerk wearing a Prada jacket. Try it with a tie. It's bloody impossible, you are instantly dismissed to the status of casual gamer/reader, and no matter what queries are posed, no matter how much I clearly know what I am talking about. The issue is for sure a gender one, but it goes beyond that. As gaming and comics become more mainstream, the 'hardcore' contigent is going to have to get over the fact that homogenity is the first thing to go, and that is a completely positive step.